Grow a baby, Pa-lease!

Here’s a little insight into the life of a married man with one son, and another baby on the way. It’s tough. I’m going to go ahead and say that the husbands job is just as hard as the wife’s job with #2.

(Maybe that is what we should call The New Guy, “#2” – “Number Two, you look so healthy, and youthful. Frau, you look so… right.” – What movie?)

Sure, Kate has to grow a baby. But you know what grow a baby means?  It means she is too tired or to sick to cook, clean, do laundry, give Bean a bath, etc.  Grow a baby means come home from work, take a nap, wake up for dinner, take a nap, wake up to throw up, take a shower, go to bed, toss and turn all night with a chance of throwing up, wake up the next morning and start alllllll  over again.  Sounds tough right?  It’s exhausting and I can totally vouch for that!  Really, I do feel bad for her.

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But a dad’s role during number two is just as hard.  Because the wife is pregnant, my day-to-day goes like this:  go to work, come home to a hungry bunch (some who yell and some who bark), feed the dogs, make dinner, empty the dishwasher, play with Bean to distract him from his stomach which is obviously eating itself because he hasn’t eaten in the last 5 minutes, finish cooking dinner, sit down for a nice family meal, wipe the spaghetti off the ceiling that Bean probably threw, wipe Bean down because he has spaghetti in his hair, watch Bean destroy the house by dragging every single toy out, play with trucks, throw the ball at the dogs, grab the little man for a bath, get soaked in the bathroom because Bean like to splash, get the little man into Pj’s, maybe a quick read, and lay him down.  Then its off to clean the kitchen, do the dishes, pick up Bean’s crap, grab a load of laundry (maybe), send Kate off to bed upset because she doesn’t like to go to bed by herself, and finally if there is nothing else going on, land on the couch for a little quiet time.  Which usually includes barking dogs.

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Do you see how much bigger my paragraph is!?!  Number Two, is very different than Number One.  The first time around you have no idea what’s coming so you spend your time by your bride’s side.  You hold her hair back while she is yacking.  You feel bad for how big her feet are getting.  With Number Two I know exactly what’s coming.  I still feel bad for her and know how hard it is to grow a baby, but my job is hard too. This time there is another little guy that needs attention or he turns into this strange screaming yelling crying little man that no one can understand.  So who takes care of Dad?  Who help’s me out during all of this?  Should I call my mom, will she help me?

I’m not writing this to be mean or take anything away from how draining it is to grow a baby, I’m just saying “where’s the love ya’ll?”  I love my bride.  I love that she is pregnant again.  I don’t even mind giving in to a little foot rub here and there.  But don’t think the man’s job in all of this is easy.  Number Two is very different and its tough!

But with all of that said, this weekend during our much needed break from each other, I missed them more than I ever have before.  Kate was home, I was in Gulf Breeze, and Bean Man was with his grandparents.  Don’t get me wrong I had a great time and I will tell you guys about that soon, but I thought about the fam all weekend.  Our life is so hectic and everyday it seems crazier than the day before.  But I love it.  The older Bean gets the more his personality shows, which means more screams and yells, but I love it.   Kate is pregnant again and she is so sick sometimes we can barely have a conversation, but that doesn’t matter either.   I still love her more than a fat kid loves cake.  This past weekend I drank for two days straight and most of that time I was surrounded by women in bikinis, but I was thinking about my preger wife back home who didn’t feel well and my kid who was having fun at Disney.  Its funny how your perspective shifts over time.

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25 Thoughts to “Grow a baby, Pa-lease!”

  1. Sarah H.

    Sweet sweet Chris! It is hard work for sure! Hang in there buddy. At least the hard work is for the most important people in the world 🙂 And I KNOW they appreciate it!

  2. Ali

    Hahaha I love the juxtaposition of Lucy’s adorable heart coller, and, you know, her face.

  3. You are a great dad and husband Chris, hang in there. One day these tough times will be just a memory and your kiddos will be smart successful adults. That’s when you can sit back, put your feet up and say it was all worth it and they owe all their success to you. Then you can get up off the couch because those successful kids will be sending your crazy grandchildren over 🙂

  4. Sounds like, from your post and Katie’s, you’re doing an outstanding job! Wow, that sounded like a report card. “Chris is doing an outstanding job in Parenting 201” ha. But yeah, Katie’s lucky to have your support.

  5. Lisa

    I love the honesty you’ve put into this Chris. I’m certain that the hubby’s role during a pregnancy isn’t really taken into consideration all that often when you think of a couple having a baby but this definitely puts a perspective on things. That being said, it sounds like you have been absolutely awesome to your family and there’s nothing wrong with wanting a little recognition or me time. Thanks for the eye opener and hang in there, it’ll all be worth it when you meet the new guy (or girl)!!

  6. Amy

    Awww…that’s fantastic!

    And what is it with wives not wanting to go to bed by themselves, and husbands not caring? I HATE going to bed on my own, it’s on the list of Top 10 recurring fights in our house. Maybe there should be an investigative blog post there?

  7. Aww – that was so sweet! I am so showing my hubby this! Also – Lucy terrifies me in that picture.

  8. Sending this to my husband…now.

  9. Jennifer

    Awe thanks for the insight. I will keep this in mind on #2.

  10. Yay for Chris posting! Love this and totally empathize with your situation, hang in there!

  11. Jen C

    First: quality Austin Powers quote! you earn bonus points for that alone 🙂
    Second: You are doing a fabulous job of taking care of everyone and everything while Katie is pukey. Not that I’ve ever been in your shoes but you definitely have my respect for all the work you’ve been doing. I’m sure Katie appreciates it as well.

  12. Great post. I am sure it is a tough job! Glad to hear that you are helping out though. I had my husband read your posts from the first pregnancy and he was cracking up. I will have to have him read this one so he knows what he is in for once number two comes along! I was sick for 21 weeks, by week 22 he was ready for a real meal!

  13. I literally am still laughing out loud-and hard-at that picture of the dogs. And great post!!!

  14. Tressa

    No doubt, being pecked to death is HARD!! lol
    Keep being the great husband and dad that you are!!

  15. Emma

    Nice to finally hear from you again Chris *cough cough*

  16. Emma

    Rolling on the floor laughing at the dog pic! Priceless. Nice to have a male insight on the pregnancy thing too. Keep up the good work, Katie is a lucky lady. Soooo showing this to my Mr. He has a few things to learn obviously!

  17. This post is why I had to talk a very reluctant Rich into #3 and why he dug his heels in and refused to even discuss #4.

    Hang in there. You’re earning really big, imaginary points!

  18. Teresa

    My husband would agree with this completely! I am due in 6 weeks with #2 and surprise! #3 and he really has to pick up the slack around the house these days! You are doing a great job!

  19. You know – I never had thought of how hard it would be on the dad.

    But have you even considered how hard it must be on the dogs?

    I mean, clearly they’re the ones who truly suffer.

  20. It’s good to be reminded of the other side of the story. I am just about due with our first baby and my poor hubby has really had to pick up a lot of slack around here. I used to love to make yummy dinners and bake goodies… now I just want to sit and nap. I can’t imagine throwing a toddler in the mix too! Cheers to the hubbies and daddies out there!

  21. aw I’m sure that she is super duper thankful!

  22. i am going to read this to my husband… he can SO relate… we are expecting our third and its basically like he became a single parent.

  23. katie

    yes, you deserve credit for taking on a full load. but i can’t help thinking the following: this (running a household, baby included) is probably a big deal for you because you aren’t used to it. my guess is that katie has had to deal with all you just mentioned primarily by herself before she got pregnant again. so, while i can understand your need for credit (which is deserved), i also understand that katie needs credit for doing all of that every day.

  24. Nate's Mom

    Chris. You need to do another blog entry. Soon. It’s not flattering to your wife to have a picture of her fake barfing on your blog’s homepage…. Just sayin’…. 🙂

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