Nuggests of Truth
1. 80% of the reason I wear a watch is so that I can tell my right from my left.
2. I have never understood how to defrost a windshield when I’m driving. Is it hot air or cold????
3. I tried to convince Chris that our family should all wear cow costumes and go as a herd of Brown cows for Halloween. He said no.
4. I haven’t taken an actual picture in weeks, so here are some from my iPhone. Bad blogger.
5. The art department at school drew a portrait of me and now I want to wear hats wherever I go because they made my forehead insanely huge.
6. I always keep a yellow onion in my kitchen because it feels like something you’re supposed to have, but I only use them, like, twice a year. The rot, and I just buy a new one every week or so.
7. I have Open House at my school tonight, and I’m nervous. Parents scare me more than middle schoolers do.
8. When it’s bath time for the kids, Chris has started this new routine where he says he’ll go downstairs and start cooking our dinner while I bathe the kids, but I’m pretty sure he’s just playing on his phone with the kitchen faucet running for effect.
9. I had a 31 Gifts party at my house last week.
10. For five years, our iron has shocked me every time I plug it in, but I’ve never bought another one.
11. For five years, our ironing board has squeaked loud enough to wake our neighborhood whenever I open it (usually at 6:00 in the morning), but I’ve never greased it.
12. My mom never answers her cell phone. I used to be able to track her down by calling my dad. Now I’m going to start calling the SWAT Team. Charge your phone and call me, Mom, or prepare for armed men to bust down your door.
13. September confuses me. Should I put up fall decorations or Halloween decorations? Help me, Martha Stewart.
14. I haven’t had my wedding rings cleaned since I got married seven years ago. I think about it a lot, but have never done it.
15. Every morning, Gracie wakes up between 5:30 and 6:00, turns her mobile on, and goes back to sleep until 7:00.
16. I don’t like to swim in the ocean, but I grew up on the beach. It’s all the Discovery Channel’s fault. Stupid Shark Week.
17. I put crates in the way-back of my car this week to organize some stuff and I feel like the smartest woman alive.
18. This week instead of Cheerios, I surprised Chris and Bean with Lucky Charms. You would have through I’d have bought them real light sabers. It’s like Christmas every morning around here.
19. Bean calls Lucky Charms “Charlie Brown’s” for some reason. We don’t know what that’s all about.
20. My 30th birthday is in two months and I’m starting to chicken out about a tattoo. Mostly because my mom said my dad would come back and haunt me if I got one. That might have been a deal breaker for me. Tattoos = Cool; Ghost Dads = Not Cool
21. My sister, JM, and Baby Tillman are coming to visit next week, and I can’t wait. I love baby snuggles!
22. MY BFF SARAH IS PREGNANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
23. I was getting on to Bean the other day and said, “What has gotten into you, Michael?” and he responded, “Umm… food?”
24. I still don’t fully understand photosynthesis.
25. Maybe that’s why I kill all my house plants.
30 Comments
Kristin
YAY, Sarah!
Also, this is a pretty funny post you’ve got going on here. đ
Abby @ I Used To Have A Brain
“like” :o)
Kate
This is too funny. đ also, you can lean your rings at home in like 5 mins! Put window cleaner in the microwave until very hot (small amount for about 2 mins). Then take it out, drop rings in the dish, and soak em for a bit. Then Scrub the nooks with a soft toothbrush! You will be amazed at what they look like!!
Rebecca @ The Reluctant Housewife
I absolutely love lists like this! That onion thing is throwing me for a loop. You really buy a new one every week or two but you never use it??? That’s crazy =)
Alice
Yay for Sarah’s pregnancy! More friends with babies = more baby snuggles! My sister just had a gorgeous baby boy and I am LOVING all the baby snuggles.
Alice đ
Katy @MonsterProof
So many fun things! Congrats, Sarah! And…OH how I wish my son could learn from Gracie! He just gets up at 5:30. SMH.
Alaina
I love this! Too many things to comment on. How did you get Gracie to do that? Aubrey wakes up usually at 6:30 on weekends, and I’d love it if she can just chill out until about 7:30.
Kat
HAHAHAHAH I love this post. Congrats to Sarah! And yay for baby snuggles. btw- P does the same thing in evening, night and morning. If she wakes up, she turns on her mobile or her glow worm, and then falls back asleep. It’s kinda cute…kinda creepy when I hear the music go on in the middle of the night.
btw – luck charms were my favorite when I was a kid.
Sarah H.
Fun post! Defrosting the windshield has always confused me tooâbut hopefully since you live in FL that doesnât come up much. I think itâs OK to only buy fruits or veggies you know you will eat that week. Iâm freeing you from your need to buy a yellow onion! And why was the art department drawing you?? I donât think I would have liked that. Now that you wrote this, people are going to try to buy you a new iron and board for your 30th! My truth is that I donât remember the last time I used either of those thingsâI use the wrinkle release spray ALL the time. I think decorating for fall in October is fine, and Iâve always liked people who decorate for Halloween just a couple days before and then take everything down Nov 1st. It doesnât need to linger and I donât need skeletons a month in advance. Now decorating with candy all over I could get in to You saw my tweet about the jewelry cleanerâbut maybe you meant you havenât had them cleaned at the jeweler? That is a nice treat, but if youâre cleaning them at home, itâs OK. I was on swim team for 8 years and never liked swimming in the ocean, I think thatâs normal. I donât like tattoos, but you do what you want. Not my body! Iâm excited you get to see your nephew and woohoo that Sarah is pregnant! So fun! All you need to know about photosynthesis is this: Plants need water, light, and CO2 (carbon dioxide) and they need all of this to make sugar (plant food). And a bi product of that reaction is oxygen which is very useful for us! People do the opposite, it’s called cellular respiration. We need the sugar and oxygen to make water and energy for ourselves and a bi product is CO2 âwhich is very useful for the plants!
Sara R.
How do you cook anything without onions?! We go through a whole bag every week.
Nikki
Thank you for the early morning giggles! I love Bean’s response, “Umm.food?” So darn cute. I want you to know that getting to read all about Bean’s life since birth has made me a little less terrified about having my first kid here in a few months. While I still have those, “Oh crap, what are we doing?” days, I still feel like reading about Bean will help me with the shock of having my own!
Christy
I just wrote a ton of comments and then my computer randomly logged off. I’m too lazy to rewrite them but to summarize-the Brown cow idea is absolute genius and Chris needs to be overruled, parents are scary and baby cuddles are relaxing, congratulations to Sarah, and tattoos are neat when they are personalized.
ang
I heart #15. Cutest thing ever!
Nicole (Piper_E)
Funny!
yay Sarah!!
I clean my rings with toothpaste and a toothbrush. That is what our jeweler told us to do in between real cleanings. It really works well! Bonus: if you are really mad at Chris you can use his toothbrush! đ
Nancy
Gracie turns on the mobile HERSELF and goes back to bed?
If you’re takin’ votes on the tattoo, put me down for a NO.
Natalie
I don’t know how to defrost my windshield either, I usually just put it on medium air and hope for the best.
Betty
Yay Sarah!!!!! Yay for Ginny & co visit!!! And, the defrost issue is a fight around here. I say hot, Matt says cold. I’m saying my way always works… My ironing board also squeaks and greasing it never entered my mind, so thank you!
Tara
Photosynthesis: Light hits a leaf. The energy from the light goes to the stuff that makes leaves green (chlorophyll). This makes the green stuff excited and it’s all like PARTY UP IN HERE! And the green stuff uses that energy to combine carbon dioxide and some other stuff to make sugars, plant energy and water.
There’s some other complicated chemical stuff but yeah. That’s about it!
Jen @ Ginger Guide
Hooray for baby snuggles, prego bffs, and toddlers who put themselves back to sleep (what kind of witchcraft are you using? I must have some). I loathe ironing and use a steamer instead, and last winter when I put on my defroster to see through the frozen rain, the whole freaking windshield cracked and scared the heck out of me.
Jen
Awesome for Mommy! Funny about Gracie! Turning the mobile on and going back to sleep.
Laura B
How do you cook without onions and why on earth are you ironing with all of the other things you have to do as a mom and wife? For all that is holy, start buying wrinkle free or throw things in the dryer to shake the wrinkles out. I iron about three times a year, usually for a wedding, funeral or other formal event.
Sandy
defrost: hot air melts ice…cold/ac melts fog(gy)
what is an iron?
suburbanmom2
I’m with you on the onion and the ironing board(only mine’s been squeaking for 26 yrs!). In September I put up fall decorations (scare crow, pumpkins, dried wreaths,etc) and layer in Halloween decorations(jack ‘o lanterns,skelletons and all scary stuff) in October as we get closer to Halloween. When Halloween is over I remove the scary stuff, keep the fall decorations and layer in some Thansgiving themed things. That is one smart baby you have,she puts herself back to sleep! Enjoy your sister time.
Conny
I love this list, such funny insights đ
About the frozen windshield: hot air will melt the ice on the outside of your windshield. Also, hot air is able to hold / absorb(?) more water than cold air, so it might help to remove condensation from inside your car. I guess the reason you’re confused is because an A/C (=cooling the air) is removing moisture from air as well, so running the A/C will actually help removing damp air from inside the car (and thus help if the window is fogged up).
So, if you need to defrost the outside of your windshield, use hot air and if you need to get rid of moisture inside your car, run the A/C and turn the temperature to warm.
End of lecture, which is probably only of theoretical use for you anyway đ
Grandma Barnes
“in the way-back” of your car ?? Does that translate to “trunk” of your car?? AND WAY TO GO – SARAH!!!!!
Courtney
I love that you call it the “way-back” too. My husband looked at me like I had two heads the first time I said that to him.
Sonya
Love the costume idea!
Andrea in SC
I love this post!!!!!! I lol-ed at the Lucky Charms = Christmas morning one! Glad to see this kind of post again <3 And I agree – I think parents are scarier than my 5th graders any day of the week……
Beth
Ok, stop buying onions after you do this. buy 2 large onions, dice them up and put them in freezer bags then put away in freezer. In the off chance you need one, just grab out a bag. and… I don’t iron. I think it has been out of the box once to sew abby’s girl scout patches on and I even stopped doing that. Bruce used to iron when he was in the army but that’s it.
Sharon
If it make you feel any better, sometimes I’m too lazy to get out my iron, so I use my hair straightener instead. *Tip* It is much less painful if you aren’t wearing the shirt when you use the straightener!