27Sep
1. 80% of the reason I wear a watch is so that I can tell my right from my left.
2. I have never understood how to defrost a windshield when I’m driving. Is it hot air or cold????
3. I tried to convince Chris that our family should all wear cow costumes and go as a herd of Brown cows for Halloween. He said no.
4. I haven’t taken an actual picture in weeks, so here are some from my iPhone. Bad blogger.
5. The art department at school drew a portrait of me and now I want to wear hats wherever I go because they made my forehead insanely huge.
6. I always keep a yellow onion in my kitchen because it feels like something you’re supposed to have, but I only use them, like, twice a year. The rot, and I just buy a new one every week or so.
7. I have Open House at my school tonight, and I’m nervous. Parents scare me more than middle schoolers do.
8. When it’s bath time for the kids, Chris has started this new routine where he says he’ll go downstairs and start cooking our dinner while I bathe the kids, but I’m pretty sure he’s just playing on his phone with the kitchen faucet running for effect.
9. I had a 31 Gifts party at my house last week.
10. For five years, our iron has shocked me every time I plug it in, but I’ve never bought another one.
11. For five years, our ironing board has squeaked loud enough to wake our neighborhood whenever I open it (usually at 6:00 in the morning), but I’ve never greased it.
12. My mom never answers her cell phone. I used to be able to track her down by calling my dad. Now I’m going to start calling the SWAT Team. Charge your phone and call me, Mom, or prepare for armed men to bust down your door.
13. September confuses me. Should I put up fall decorations or Halloween decorations? Help me, Martha Stewart.
14. I haven’t had my wedding rings cleaned since I got married seven years ago. I think about it a lot, but have never done it.
15. Every morning, Gracie wakes up between 5:30 and 6:00, turns her mobile on, and goes back to sleep until 7:00.
16. I don’t like to swim in the ocean, but I grew up on the beach. It’s all the Discovery Channel’s fault. Stupid Shark Week.
17. I put crates in the way-back of my car this week to organize some stuff and I feel like the smartest woman alive.
18. This week instead of Cheerios, I surprised Chris and Bean with Lucky Charms. You would have through I’d have bought them real light sabers. It’s like Christmas every morning around here.
19. Bean calls Lucky Charms “Charlie Brown’s” for some reason. We don’t know what that’s all about.
20. My 30th birthday is in two months and I’m starting to chicken out about a tattoo. Mostly because my mom said my dad would come back and haunt me if I got one. That might have been a deal breaker for me. Tattoos = Cool; Ghost Dads = Not Cool
21. My sister, JM, and Baby Tillman are coming to visit next week, and I can’t wait. I love baby snuggles!
22. MY BFF SARAH IS PREGNANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
23. I was getting on to Bean the other day and said, “What has gotten into you, Michael?” and he responded, “Umm… food?”
24. I still don’t fully understand photosynthesis.
25. Maybe that’s why I kill all my house plants.
1) Kristin: YAY, Sarah! Also, this is a pretty funny post you've got going on here. :) (09.27.2012 07:13am)
2) Abby @ I Used To Have A Brain: "like" :o) (09.27.2012 07:40am)
3) Kate: This is too funny. :) also, you can lean your rings at home in like 5 mins! Put window cleaner in the microwave until very hot (small amount for about 2 mins). Then take it out, drop rings in the dish, and soak em for a bit. Then Scrub the nooks with a soft toothbrush! You will be amazed at what they look like!! (09.27.2012 08:05am)
4) Rebecca @ The Reluctant Housewife: I absolutely love lists like this! That onion thing is throwing me for a loop. You really buy a new one every week or two but you never use it??? That's crazy =) (09.27.2012 08:22am)
5) Alice: Yay for Sarah's pregnancy! More friends with babies = more baby snuggles! My sister just had a gorgeous baby boy and I am LOVING all the baby snuggles. Alice :) (09.27.2012 08:37am)
6) Katy @MonsterProof: So many fun things! Congrats, Sarah! And...OH how I wish my son could learn from Gracie! He just gets up at 5:30. SMH. (09.27.2012 08:39am)
7) Alaina: I love this! Too many things to comment on. How did you get Gracie to do that? Aubrey wakes up usually at 6:30 on weekends, and I'd love it if she can just chill out until about 7:30. (09.27.2012 08:44am)
8) Kat: HAHAHAHAH I love this post. Congrats to Sarah! And yay for baby snuggles. btw- P does the same thing in evening, night and morning. If she wakes up, she turns on her mobile or her glow worm, and then falls back asleep. It's kinda cute...kinda creepy when I hear the music go on in the middle of the night. btw - luck charms were my favorite when I was a kid. (09.27.2012 08:51am)
9) Sarah H.: Fun post! Defrosting the windshield has always confused me too—but hopefully since you live in FL that doesn’t come up much. I think it’s OK to only buy fruits or veggies you know you will eat that week. I’m freeing you from your need to buy a yellow onion! And why was the art department drawing you?? I don’t think I would have liked that. Now that you wrote this, people are going to try to buy you a new iron and board for your 30th! My truth is that I don’t remember the last time I used either of those things—I use the wrinkle release spray ALL the time. I think decorating for fall in October is fine, and I’ve always liked people who decorate for Halloween just a couple days before and then take everything down Nov 1st. It doesn’t need to linger and I don’t need skeletons a month in advance. Now decorating with candy all over I could get in to You saw my tweet about the jewelry cleaner—but maybe you meant you haven’t had them cleaned at the jeweler? That is a nice treat, but if you’re cleaning them at home, it’s OK. I was on swim team for 8 years and never liked swimming in the ocean, I think that’s normal. I don’t like tattoos, but you do what you want. Not my body! I’m excited you get to see your nephew and woohoo that Sarah is pregnant! So fun! All you need to know about photosynthesis is this: Plants need water, light, and CO2 (carbon dioxide) and they need all of this to make sugar (plant food). And a bi product of that reaction is oxygen which is very useful for us! People do the opposite, it's called cellular respiration. We need the sugar and oxygen to make water and energy for ourselves and a bi product is CO2 –which is very useful for the plants! (09.27.2012 08:52am)
10) Sara R.: How do you cook anything without onions?! We go through a whole bag every week. (09.27.2012 09:00am)
11) Nikki: Thank you for the early morning giggles! I love Bean's response, "Umm.food?" So darn cute. I want you to know that getting to read all about Bean's life since birth has made me a little less terrified about having my first kid here in a few months. While I still have those, "Oh crap, what are we doing?" days, I still feel like reading about Bean will help me with the shock of having my own! (09.27.2012 09:22am)
12) Christy: I just wrote a ton of comments and then my computer randomly logged off. I'm too lazy to rewrite them but to summarize-the Brown cow idea is absolute genius and Chris needs to be overruled, parents are scary and baby cuddles are relaxing, congratulations to Sarah, and tattoos are neat when they are personalized. (09.27.2012 09:28am)
13) ang: I heart #15. Cutest thing ever! (09.27.2012 09:31am)
14) Nicole (Piper_E): Funny! yay Sarah!! I clean my rings with toothpaste and a toothbrush. That is what our jeweler told us to do in between real cleanings. It really works well! Bonus: if you are really mad at Chris you can use his toothbrush! ;) (09.27.2012 09:34am)
15) Nancy: Gracie turns on the mobile HERSELF and goes back to bed? If you're takin' votes on the tattoo, put me down for a NO. (09.27.2012 10:08am)
16) Natalie: I don't know how to defrost my windshield either, I usually just put it on medium air and hope for the best. (09.27.2012 10:23am)
17) Betty: Yay Sarah!!!!! Yay for Ginny & co visit!!! And, the defrost issue is a fight around here. I say hot, Matt says cold. I'm saying my way always works... My ironing board also squeaks and greasing it never entered my mind, so thank you! (09.27.2012 10:28am)
18) Tara: Photosynthesis: Light hits a leaf. The energy from the light goes to the stuff that makes leaves green (chlorophyll). This makes the green stuff excited and it's all like PARTY UP IN HERE! And the green stuff uses that energy to combine carbon dioxide and some other stuff to make sugars, plant energy and water. There's some other complicated chemical stuff but yeah. That's about it! (09.27.2012 10:41am)
19) Jen @ Ginger Guide: Hooray for baby snuggles, prego bffs, and toddlers who put themselves back to sleep (what kind of witchcraft are you using? I must have some). I loathe ironing and use a steamer instead, and last winter when I put on my defroster to see through the frozen rain, the whole freaking windshield cracked and scared the heck out of me. (09.27.2012 10:47am)
20) Jen: Awesome for Mommy! Funny about Gracie! Turning the mobile on and going back to sleep. (09.27.2012 11:57am)
21) Laura B: How do you cook without onions and why on earth are you ironing with all of the other things you have to do as a mom and wife? For all that is holy, start buying wrinkle free or throw things in the dryer to shake the wrinkles out. I iron about three times a year, usually for a wedding, funeral or other formal event. (09.27.2012 12:22pm)
22) Sandy: defrost: hot air melts ice...cold/ac melts fog(gy) what is an iron? (09.27.2012 01:10pm)
23) suburbanmom2: I'm with you on the onion and the ironing board(only mine's been squeaking for 26 yrs!). In September I put up fall decorations (scare crow, pumpkins, dried wreaths,etc) and layer in Halloween decorations(jack 'o lanterns,skelletons and all scary stuff) in October as we get closer to Halloween. When Halloween is over I remove the scary stuff, keep the fall decorations and layer in some Thansgiving themed things. That is one smart baby you have,she puts herself back to sleep! Enjoy your sister time. (09.27.2012 02:28pm)
24) Conny: I love this list, such funny insights :) About the frozen windshield: hot air will melt the ice on the outside of your windshield. Also, hot air is able to hold / absorb(?) more water than cold air, so it might help to remove condensation from inside your car. I guess the reason you're confused is because an A/C (=cooling the air) is removing moisture from air as well, so running the A/C will actually help removing damp air from inside the car (and thus help if the window is fogged up). So, if you need to defrost the outside of your windshield, use hot air and if you need to get rid of moisture inside your car, run the A/C and turn the temperature to warm. End of lecture, which is probably only of theoretical use for you anyway :) (09.27.2012 03:18pm)
25) Grandma Barnes: "in the way-back" of your car ?? Does that translate to "trunk" of your car?? AND WAY TO GO - SARAH!!!!! (09.27.2012 04:39pm)
26) Courtney: I love that you call it the "way-back" too. My husband looked at me like I had two heads the first time I said that to him. (09.27.2012 06:20pm)
27) Sonya: Love the costume idea! (09.27.2012 07:20pm)
28) Andrea in SC: I love this post!!!!!! I lol-ed at the Lucky Charms = Christmas morning one! Glad to see this kind of post again <3 And I agree - I think parents are scarier than my 5th graders any day of the week...... (09.27.2012 07:44pm)
29) Beth: Ok, stop buying onions after you do this. buy 2 large onions, dice them up and put them in freezer bags then put away in freezer. In the off chance you need one, just grab out a bag. and... I don't iron. I think it has been out of the box once to sew abby's girl scout patches on and I even stopped doing that. Bruce used to iron when he was in the army but that's it. (09.27.2012 09:53pm)
30) Sharon: If it make you feel any better, sometimes I'm too lazy to get out my iron, so I use my hair straightener instead. *Tip* It is much less painful if you aren't wearing the shirt when you use the straightener! (09.27.2012 09:54pm)