Ginny vs. The Birthing Ball

So, my sister and I were talking this week and she told me a story that made me wet my pants.  Seriously.  I laughed so hard that I peed my pants.  I figured if that wasn’t blog-worthy, then what was?

Ginny is currently eight months pregnant.  I think.  Maybe.  I’m not really sure because I’m a terrible sister.  But she is due in early January, so I think that’s probably about right.

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Anyway, for the birth of her sweet Baby Faith (is that not the sweetest name?!?!  We’ll have a Grace and a Faith in our family!), Ginny is hoping for a natural childbirth.  She says “hoping” as if she isn’t sure she can do it, but I’m here to tell you that she can.  That woman is like a machine when she puts her mind to something.  But let’s not harass her to make a decision one way or another.  She’ll make the decision that’s right for her, Faith, and her family, I’m sure.

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But for now, she and her husband, John Michael, are preparing for a natural childbirth by taking childbirthing classes.  The stories of JM in these classes are enough to make me pee my pants alone.  He’s a pretty funny guy and, from what Gin tells me, it’s a pretty funny class.  Although, she is a little concerned because she and JM think it’s funny in the first place.  “Maybe the fact that we think it’s funny just shows that we can’t handle natural childbirth,” she has wondered.

I happen to strongly disagree.  If you can’t laugh about something, then you probably shouldn’t do it in the first place.

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At their last childbirth class, the instructor showed them several different birthing positions to try during labor.  JM took the paper with the images on them and immediately started ticking them off, “Nope… No… Too weird…  No… Nope…”  And finally Ginny had to remind him that SHE would be the one in the birthing position, not him.   Ahhh… husbands.  Reminds me of how whenever anyone asks me about how c-section deliveries are, Chris chimes right in with, “Oh, they are a BREEZE!  Wham, bam, here’s your baby!  We loved them!”

Funny how I remember that part sliiiiiiiiiiiightly differently….

But back to the birthing ball.

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So Ginny and JM have to take a birthing ball with them to their childbirth classes, and since they go to the classes every week, Ginny keeps this giant birthing ball in the back of her car.  Well, one day last week, she was jostling her work bag, purse, Tillman’s diaper bag, and Tillman himself, all with her keys in her hand, like any working mom has done 100 times, and somehow in the shuffle, someone or something hit the trunk button on her key ring.  Suddenly, her trunk flies open and out pops this giant birthing ball.

Ginny said she stood there in all her pregnant glory, arms full of paperwork and children and diaper bags, and watched as her giant birthing ball bounced down her driveway and out into the street.

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She paused for a second and thought, “Well, this sucks,” before springing into action.

Now, Ginny and JM live at the top of a very steep hill in Atlanta.  So, her birthing ball took a left out of their driveway and proceeded to bounce itself down her very long, very steep street.  Ginny ditched everything in her arms, including Tillman, who kept pointing and yelling, “BALL! BALL!  BALL GO BYE BYE!”

(Side note: Is he not the cutest nephew EVER?????)

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In her very high heels with her very pregnant belly, Ginny quickly shuffled down to the end of the driveway, but it was hopeless.  The birthing ball was going 90 miles an hour down that darn hill and she knew she’d never catch it.

But, damn.  Those birthing balls are expensive!

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So, she shuffled her preggo self back up to her car, where she shoved everything she had dropped in her driveway (once again, including Tillman) into her car.  And in her giant suburbanite SUV, she chased her birthing ball all throughout her neighborhood.  But by the time she got to the bottom of the hill, the birthing ball was out of sight completely.

“I LOST MA’ BIRTHIN’ BALL!” she yelled into my ear hysterically on the phone.  “Is this a sign?!?!  Maybe this is a sign…”

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Ginny’s neighborhood has a Facebook page, when we got off the phone that night, she was on her way to post on the wall:  “MISSING: Bright purple birthing ball.”

Oh, man.  I love that girl.

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14 Thoughts to “Ginny vs. The Birthing Ball”

  1. Rebekah G

    Well we have to know…..DID SHE FIND IT???

  2. Amy

    Oh my goodness!! I should not have read this while trying to nurse my baby to sleep. I managed to stifle the audible laughs, but was unable to control the belly laugh convulsions. Totally worth the now-fully-awake wee one! Can’t wait to hear if the ball is returned and how actual labor goes! Thanks for the laugh, Katie and Ginny!

  3. Bean, Gracie & Tillman's Nana

    This is SUCH a Ginny story! But I have to say that her “birthing plan” is very UNnatural for our family. She told me today that she has put her plan on an excel spreadsheet! I say, put on your pearls and get the shot! That’s the way God intended the Tillman women to birth children.

    1. Tabs

      Hahaha! You, nana, are hilarious!!!

      And that story was hilarious!! I would have peed my pants too! (Because my friend has made me do that before…and before baby no less!)

  4. Ha! I don’t think it’s missing, I think she just stuffed it under her shirt! 😉 but what a funny story! As someone who’s done the natural thing three times now, I have two things to say: 1. Parenting is all about what happens after birth! So however they come out, you’ve only managed your first day (or two) with that baby. 2. Go Ginny! It is totally possible and totally awesome! It’s just one day of your life, in a normal birth the pain isn’t the worst thing thing you’re ever going to experience and it’s totally an incredible experience! Preparation is 80% of the natural birth battle, you’ll do great!!

    1. I was thinking the same thing! There it is! In the last picture!

  5. Alexis

    Oh Ginny, Ginny, Ginny…. How I love that oh-so-Ginny story. If only I was on that FB group. I would have peed my pants just reading that post. Not sure they go missing often 😉 hoping she finds it quick. You’re looking wonderful girl!!! 🙂

  6. Two stories on the name Faith:

    1) I have a Faith too and Ginny should be prepared for the weirdest thing: people get her name wrong. Especially when she was little, people would call her Grace or Hope ALL THE TIME. It’s like the words are interchangeable in people’s heads and thus so are the names.

    2) A couple of weeks ago, our pastor was giving a message on the concept of faith and he made the point, “Sometimes you have to spell faith R-I-S-K”. He repeated that a couple of times and now my 14 year old Faith is dying to start spelling her name R-I-S-K. She daydreams of teachers calling role “Risk Myers?” and her casually answering, “It’s pronounced Faith.”

  7. As I 29 week pregnant lady, I feel like my life is constant stream of clumsily chasing bright purple birthing balls. Great metaphor for third trimester.

  8. But.. but… did she get her ball back?

    1. Ginny

      Sadly, I never did find it. Bought a new pink one yesterday! 🙂

  9. Becky

    What nana said!!!

    …but then I had a planned c-section. 😉

    Best
    Thing
    Ever!!!

    for ME.

    And yes, Tilman is the cutest nephew ever…LOVE that smile 🙂

  10. I hate your sister for being so pregnant and not looking like a funky oompa loompa like I did

  11. Maple

    Go Ginny Go! I had a natural unmedicated birth and it was AMAZING. I hope your birth goes according to plan as well!!

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