09Jul
So I have all this beautiful new furniture in my house that the dogs are not allowed on – at all. The process of getting them to stay off the furniture has been…challenging. So far, I think they have mastered the idea that they can’t be on the furniture when I’m in the room. As I’m walking into the living room I often hear a little thud (that would be Lucy) followed by a big thud (that would be Molly) as they jump off the furniture. I walk into the room and they are both standing there looking at me. So guilty. They don’t even try to hide it.
Last night I was sitting on the love seat, dreaming of accent pillows, when Lucy decided to hell with the new rules and jumped right up next to me and laid down. I pushed her off the couch with my forceful, “OFF!” command. She immediately walked over to the ottoman and jumped right up on it, like she owned the joint.
“OFF!” I yell again.
She then jumps from the ottoman straight to the club chair, looking at me the whole time like, “What do you think about THAT???”
“OFF!” I yell, but this time it comes out more in the tone of “What are you doing, you overstuffed chihuahua?!?”
And she immediately jumps from the club chair to our second club chair.
“FREAKING GET OFF MY FURNITURE, LUCY!” I yell out (lets pause to reflect what a good parent I will be one day…)
Lucy casually jumps off this chair and on to the floor because she has run out of furniture to jump onto, and she sashays over to her bed and lays day, being sure to sigh as loud as possible as she closes her eyes.
My dogs are rebelling. If I wasn’t so amused, I’d be really pissed!
15Jun
There are many things that I love about my Dad – his sense of humor, his laugh, his golf tan, his relationship with my Mom, his passion for golf and a good glass of wine, his commitment to whatever it is my sister and I are doing at that moment. But perhaps the thing that has grown to be the most important to me is my Dad’s consistency.
My Dad is as consistent as the day is long. He’s a creature of habit and as loyal a person as you’ll ever meet. As a kid, consistency meant that I knew my boundaries from day one. I knew coming home at 12:05 AM was late because he consistently told us, “Nothing good happens after midnight.” And as an adult now, I think I appreciate his consistency even more. I love knowing that if I call after 10:00 AM on a weekday, he’ll be on the golf course but he’ll still answer his phone, and he will either say in a whisper, “I’ve got to call you back, Kitten, I’m on the golf course” or he’ll chat with me for a few minutes between holes and then frantically cut the conversation short because, “Gotta go – its my shot!” But he will always call me back as soon as he finishes his round. Because he is consistent.
I love that consistently, every 2 or 3 months, he needs a “Katie fix” and he’ll find some way to see me. Two summers ago Chris took a summer job out in Utah at a theater and so I was in New Haven by myself. Ever the faithful father, my Dad jumped in his car, drove two days to get here and stayed with me for a week. Every day I came home from work, he would be sitting on my back deck, with a glass of wine. And every night he would take me to some new restaurant and we would sample the menus, always concluding the night with a trip to his favorite ice cream shop. It was a consistent week in the middle of a crazy summer.
And my Dad is as consistent with his values as he is with his routine. He not only told me how important politics, a love of the country, and loyalty to your values are, he showed them to me – for 25 years now. He jokes often that my sister and I should, “Do as I say, not as I do,” followed by that great, big laugh. But in reality, there is no one else I could model my values after if I tried. He leads by example, and he is a consistent demonstrator.
In my life today, there are ever-changing factors. Will we buy? Will we move? Where will Chris work? When will we have kids? Will I change job? Should I cut my hair? Is the dog sick? Is the laundry done? How long will we live here? When will we grow up? Should we build a cedar fence or pine? But just when I get to the point where things seem to spin out of control, my Dad somehow knows when to pick up the phone and suddenly, life is calm again. His consistency is contagious and I love him for it and for bringing it into my life.
I guess in lots of ways, I’m like my Dad, because I consistently miss him.
Love you, Dad.
28May
After 3 years of grad school, I am so proud to say that Chris has finally graduated from the Yale School of Drama! WOO HOO!!! I have ever been more proud of anyone in my entire life. And to make this time even more special for him so many special people showed up to support him throughout the weekend. Other than my own wedding day, I have never felt so much love in one place before. Family and friends really went above and beyond to rain down love on both Chris and me this weekend. I think that is what I will remember the most from this incredible weekend.
We had 17 people in town to celebrate with us. Chris and I had a very strict schedule planned for the weekend in order to keep things moving along smoothly, and it went incredibly well.
Friday night, Chris’ Mom and her boyfriend, Charles, Chris’ sister, Annie, and my family all got into town. We went out to dinner for pizza and enjoyed being with the smallest group of people we’d have all weekend.
On Saturday, we took the entire crew who had all arrived in town (17 people total) to New York for the day. The original plan was that we would all split up and do our own thing in smaller groups and then just meet up for dinner. But when I mentioned taking my side of the family to China Town, everyone decided to go! We took the entire crew (minus two who decided to go all athletic on us and walk the Brooklyn Bridge!!) to China Town and we didn’t lose one single person. Personally, I contribute this to excellent planning by the event coordinator (that would be yours truly) but instead I think it might be because it was so darn crowded you could only move about 3 ft. per 5 minutes. Its hard to loose people when they are morphed together by small, Chinese people.
That night for dinner we went to dinner at one of our favorite restaurants in the Theater District, Angus McIndoe (if you go, try the salmon with apple stuffing – WOW!). A few friends from New York joined us for dinner and let me tell you – the wine was flowing. We had a wonderful, alcohol-induced love fest. By the end of the night we were all friends. Didn’t matter that we were technically three different families. Didn’t matter that several of us were divorced or in a family world war. That night we were all there for Chris and you really felt that at the table.
Once we got back into New Haven on Sunday, we spent the day walking around the campus and showing the family where and what we’ve been doing for the past three years. And then, of course, on Monday was THE DAY. I think the pictures speak for themselves. Can you see the relief in mine and Chris’ face?
Granddaddy and Grandma Brown, Chris, and me
My sister, Ginny, Me, Chris, and Chris’ sister, Annie
Chris with my family
Chris, his sister, his mom, and me
OUR Family
It was a perfect weekend. And I can’t tell you how relieved that Chris and I feel. It literally feels like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. While the weight of Chris going through school wasn’t on me, there was the constant pressure of being the only source of income, of wondering what would come next for us, of being chained to an academic schedule. I was really surprised how much pressure I was feeling. I didn’t realize it truly until this weekend when the weight lifted. I was almost lightheaded at some points.
And I cried. I told you that I would. I couldn’t help it. Chris looked so handsome in his cap and gown, and Yale is just so regal and majestic in their traditions that seeing Chris walk through gates that have seen over 300 graduating classes before, well, it would make anyone cry. But what happy tears!
I tell you something. I have sometimes thought about writing a book about mine and Chris’ relationship – something similar to what this blog is but the full story, starting all the way back when we were 15 years old. And while there are many reasons that this idea is truly a pie-in-the-sky thought, the most significant reason I can’t write this book is because stories are supposed to have ups and downs. There are supposed to be conflicts and resolutions. Fall outs and make ups. Fairy tales always have a dragon or evil queen in them, but so far Chris and I have just been blessed with roses and rainbows. I keep expecting a poisoned apple to fall in our paths, but we’ve been witch-free for 3 years. Now this doesn’t mean we don’t have our hang-ups and breakdowns. But we’ve weathered them, lived through them, learned from them, and moved on. I’m so full of happiness right now that I can’t wait to jump into the next phase of our lives. A new house! Chris’ new job! Maybe a baby eventually? Whatever that next phase is, I’m so ready for it.
03Apr
I have not written about the Ultimate April Fools Day Prank that was pulled off on April 1, 2008 because up until now I could not talk about it without becoming so angry at my sister that I would begin shaking and spitting out vile language like a sailor. I just didn’t feel that was healthy, so forgive the delayed blog.
Now that I am past that stage, however, I feel the need to share what I am willing to bet is one of the top 5 best April Fools Day jokes in history. Before I tell you about it, you’re going to need some background on my sister, affectionately referred to in this posting as The Lying Jack Ass (LJA). The LJA is, like me, in her early 20s. But that is really about the only similarity there. She’s single – I’m married. She’s carefree – I just signed a living will last month. She’s trendy – I wear a cardigan every other day. She was her sorority president in college – I cried through rush and never pledged. Got the picture?
(The Lying Jack Ass at Christmas. Classy.)
More necessary background to know is that she works in PR for a company in Atlanta and has been talking about how some of her clients are going through major restructuring. Many of her clients are international. Okay, I think that’s it for background.
So, April 1, The LJA sends out the following email to our parents and me. The title of the email is: BIG NEWS: Family Discussion Needed ASAP:
Hello,
I just got off a call with *HER BOSS* regarding the reorganization of the *** account which we’ve been working on for awhile. She is in London this week and asked that I call her from her office so we could have a private and confidential discussion around ** and the new global consumer practice. I want to put all of this background information in a note to you all so we can discuss later today — I have some big decisions to make.
*HER BOSS* mentioned about a week ago that the main growth area for both ** & ** will be in Asia over the next 3-5 years. She had off the cuff asked me how I felt about moving to London and Shanghai over the past few weeks — all of which I said I was open to in order to further my career and as long as it was under the right conditions.
*HER BOSS* just offered me a tremendous opportunity working as the Asia laison for both ** and **. They have decided to base both of these practices out of London, instead of the US because of the exchange rates and ideal time zone locations in doing business globally. I would be based in Shanghai and split much of my other time between London and NY. This would give me an opportunity to carve out my own career instead of going with the traditional PR track — and the money is incredible. It’s equivilent to about *A LOT OF MONEY* and still with full benefits. They would also pay all moving expenses.
I know this is a lot of information to throw at you in an email but I wanted to tell all of you at once and let you sit on it for a minute. Tonight I’ll call you guys so we can weigh our options. The tricky part is that I have until Friday to make a decision. They would want me to be moved and settled by May 1st in order to jump start the new fiscal on July 1st.
I’m really, really, really excited about this opportunity. Its a huge kudos to me and sounds like a tremendous opportunity. I’m anxious for your feedback tonight.
Love you!
*The LJY*
So, I get this email while I am sitting at my desk at work. I was so upset that I could feel myself starting to cry, so I call Chris who is walking home from a class and I asked him to come get me from my office. He comes and sits in my office a while to talk me off the ledge, so to speak. As I’m trying to regain my composure, my boss walks in and I tell him that I think my sister is moving to China and he sits down to talk it through with us for a while.
After I get myself together, Chris and I head out for a long lunch. I am so upset at this point, I can’t even drive somewhere. The whole time I’m saying, “She can’t move to China! She doesn’t even know how to file her taxes!” (NOTE: She filed her taxes this year and claimed her two roommates as dependents…). Chris and I are frantically trying to come up with a way to talk her out of this without pushing her to run to China (she tends to rebel against advice she doesn’t want to hear – Sorry to say it, Gin.). We had tickets to Cirque du Soliel that night and had decided that we weren’t going to go so that I could stay home and talk to her about it.
At this same point in time, my poor mother is reading this email in Jacksonville, Florida. She, too, bursts into tears and has to leave her office. On her way out to her car, she runs into a co-worker who stops her because she is, clearly, devastated. My mom and her friend sit down for an hour coming up with how to talk her out of moving to China. My mom thanks her friend, and gets up to go outside to clear her head.
While she is outside, she calls my dad, who has not had access to his email at this point. My mom reads him the email from The LJA and before she can even finish the email, he hangs up the phone and no one can get a hold of him all afternoon. We assume he is driving to Atlanta to knock some sense into The LJA.
Also at this point in time, my BFF, who I forwarded my sister’s email to just after I received it, has forwarded the email to her boyfriend who also works on international accounts. My BFF tells her BF that she thinks they should begin to think more globally for their futures. Her BF disagrees. They start fighting.
As this is all taking place, Chris and I have found ourselves in a Subway parking lot. My cell phone rings. Its The LJA. She says, “Did you get my email?” “Uh, yeah,” I say, trying to be upbeat and not sniffle too loudly into the phone. Inside I’m screaming, ‘YOU’LL NEVER SEE YOUR NIECES AND NEPHEWS!!!!!’ and ‘YOU CAN’T EVEN FILE YOUR TAXES!!!!!!!!!!’ The LJA kind of laughs and says, “Yeah, but did you get the second email?” Huh? “APRIL FOOLS!” she yells. I immediately hang up the phone.
She kept my parents going for a little while longer, but not too much longer once she found out how upset we all were. My Mom still isn’t speaking to her, I don’t think. And my poor Dad was MIA for half the day. My BFF and her BF are still fighting, I think.
If you think about it, its really the perfect April Fools joke. Just believable enough for us to buy it, but just far fetched enough to send us over the edge. And when you add in the fact that no one other than middle school kids ever remember April Fools Day, its the perfect joke.
Too bad I’ll never be able to speak to The LJA again. She’s kind of a fun kid.
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