Molly | Marriage Confessions Molly | Laugh. Fight. Stay Married.

We have a lot of living beings in our house. Me and Chris, two wild two legged beasts, two wild four legged beasts, and a fish named Lt. Dan (cause he ain’t got no legs). When we’re all home and at full capacity, it’s a little overwhelming. And God help the person who calls me when all living beings in our house are hungry. It’s like World War 3 around here at meal times – every man (or beast) (or Bean) for themselves.

In all the hustle of our daily grind, I do feel bad for our dogs. They really get the shaft these days. Especially Lucy. Lucy has gone from my college days when she used to sleep in my bed with me every night, to married days when Chris kicked her out of bed at night, but let her back in to snuggle in the mornings, to parenting days where she’s shunned from all beds and is now forced to sleep on a pillow on the floor. Like some kind of animal. I feel for her. Truly.

As you can imagine, she is none too thrilled with her current living situation. And she lets us know this. Frequently. Lucy now barks at just about everything. The mailman, mothers walking babies down the street, the wind blowing leaves in the back yard… you name it and she will bark at it. Generally speaking, she walks around pissed off most of the time. She’s always been like an angry old lady, but these days she actually IS a cranky old lady.

Poor Lucy.

But it is actually Molly who I feel so guilty about tonight. I feel double guilty, really, because I didn’t even remember this terrible story I’m about to tell you that happened two nights ago until my sister reminded me about it today.

Double guilt is the worst.

So, two nights ago…

IN MY DEFENSE…(bad sign when someone already gets defensive before the story even begins)… Chris had been working long, crazy hours, and we were both exhausted. So there.

Anyway, two nights ago, I put the kids to bed, cleaned up the house, watched five or six HOURS of Glee on Netflicks, and then headed to bed. Chris came home around midnight, I mumbled hello or something, and then we both went right to sleep.

Until I was woken up at 1:30am by barking in my backyard. Normally, that wouldn’t wake me up, but this was familiar barking. This was barking I knew. This was Big Molly’s barking.

I threw the covers back and ran, half asleep, to the backdoor. I flung it open and there sat Molly. On our back porch. In the cold. At 1:30am.

God knows how long she’d been out there. Or why she hadn’t barked until 1:30 in the morning. Maybe I left her out there since 8:00 when I let the dogs out for the last time and she sat there for a while, realized I wasn’t coming back, and was finally like, “Peace out to you, losers. I’m going to Steak ‘n Shake.” And then she left and didn’t get back home until 1:30 in the morning.

I’m not really sure what happened. It might have been that.

Or, maybe, she had been barking outside to come back in and in the utter chaos that is our household, I just didn’t hear her. FOR FIVE HOURS.

It was probably that.

Either way, when I opened that door and saw her sitting there in the middle of the night all by herself in the cold, my heart broke and I felt so terrible. Not just for leaving her outside, but for how our dogs have been pushed so far to the side since we’ve had two babies. I never thought I’d be THAT dog owner. I love my dogs. The entire first two years of this blog is about them, actually. And now they just kind of get pushed to the side and forgotten.

WELL NO MORE!

Starting today, my dogs are front and center again. Belly rubs, ear scratches, apple slices, peanut butter Kongs – anything they want.

Well, anything after 7:30 when the kids go to bed.

And anything that’s free cause most of our money goes to the kids now.

But anything that’s free after 7:30 is THEIRS!

30 comments | posted in Around the House, Lucy, Marriage Confessions, Molly, The Dog Pound | tags: dogs, Family, pets

From the minute we brought Bean home from the hospital, Big Molly has been right by his side.

She used to lay down where ever he was – next to his bouncer, next to the swing, next to him on the floor, and even in his room at night. She was hopelessly in love with him.

As Bean has gotten older and more mobile, Molly and Bean have stayed tight. They go everywhere together.

Today, I was sitting in the living room and out of nowhere, Molly walks by with Buzz Lightyear riding on her back. I suspect Bean.

Sweet, sweet Molly. No matter how rough Bean gets with her, she just lays there with him. Always patient. Always loving. Never even a hint of frustration or anger from her. Bean climbs all over that poor dog and she seems to love him even more for it.

I thought nothing would ever come close to the love between Bean and Big Molly. But then I walked into the living room today and saw this strangely familiar sight.

It seems like just yesterday that Bean was laying down on the floor under Molly’s watchful eye. And now, it’s Gracie Girl’s turn.

I hope Bean doesn’t mind loaning out his furry friend to his sister every now and then…

28 comments | posted in Around the House, Marriage Confessions, Molly, The Dog Pound | tags: babies, dogs, Family

They say that when you’re pregnant, your dogs can sense that something is up.Â With Bean, this was true.Â Lucy and Molly stayed closer to me, were quieter, and were gentler during my whole pregnancy.Â And then Bean came along and their lives changed forever.

This time around is slightly different.Â For one thing, the dogs don’t sense that something is up.Â They KNOW.Â And they KNOW exactly what’s going on.Â They’ve seen this before.Â And, trust me, they are none too pleased about this unexpected turn of events.

Each dog is preparing for the arrival of our second baby very differently.Â Lucy is just angry.Â Pissed off.Â Mad.Â She walks around snapping and barking.Â She demands food.Â Demands to be let out.Â Refuses to get off the furniture.Â Has no patience with Bean.Â Hates us and her life.Â Every so often I’ll catch her giving me the stink eye and I can see her thinking, “I can’t believe you’re doing this to me again.”

Molly though is taking on a very unusual fascination since I’ve become pregnant.Â The closer we get to welcoming Baby Gracie, the more obsessed Molly becomes with shadows and light beams.

It’s almost like she knows that our time is getting ready to be taken up even more and so she better go ahead and find a new way to keep herself entertained.Â And shadows and light beams have become her coping mechanism.Â We started noticing this weird new thing a couple weeks ago.Â Every night that we sat on the couch and watched TV, Molly was right under our feet.Â Which is pretty normal.Â But she wasn’t interested in us or what was going on around us.Â She was interested in the shadows and light that the TV made dance under the table.Â She fixed her eyes on them and every fiber of her being waited in nervous anticipation for one of those shadows that the TV cast to flash up under the living room table.

It is the weirdest thing Chris and I have ever seen. It’s like Molly is possessed. She’ll sit and stare at them for oddly long amounts of time. In fact, these pictures all look like they were taken in sequence really quickly, but they were actually taken over the course of several hours. She just never moved. For hours. Oh, except for her tail. Her tail wags violently the whole time she’s sitting there.

I think she’s cracking up. I think bringing Bean into her life was a big change, but bringing another baby into her life might have actually pushed her over the edge. And I feel bad for her. I really do. I know just how she feels. Sometimes I find myself wishing I could climb under the coffee table and not deal with anything else, too. But change is a fast-moving freight change, my friend. And Molly hears the whistle blowing. She just won’t stop staring at the tracks.

*****
Today I am grateful that Chris cooks dinner every night.

23 comments | posted in Around the House, Marriage Confessions, Molly, pregnancy | tags: dogs and pregnancy, pets

(Warning: This post is about poop.Â Lots of poop.Â Proceed at your own risk.Â Just be thankful that my camera cord is still missing and so I don’t have any pictures to share.)

For the first few years of Lucy’s life, I was living in college apartments.Â That meant that she learned how to walk on a leash pretty good because I had to walk her every day.Â She got so good that she could actually go to the bathroom on command.

“Go potty, Lucy.”

Done.

But when we got Big Molly, we lived in a house with a fenced in backyard which meant that she never really learned to walk much on a leash.Â Anytime we took her somewhere to run her, she was off-leash in a fenced in field and a leash usually wasn’t necessary.Â She’s not horrible on a leash, but she isn’t great.Â And she certainly can’t go to the bathroom on command.Â In fact, Big Molly is having a hard time going to the bathroom at all now that we are at my parent’s house and having to walk her on a leash.Â She doesn’t like an audience and so whenever we walk her, she happily goes for a little walk but there isn’t much business being done.

(I promise there is a reason for me to tell you about my dog’s bowel movements.)

So, yesterday afternoon when Chris got home from work, we decided to take the dogs to the dog park here where my parents live.Â It is one of the nicest dog parks I’ve ever been to and our dogs love it.Â Without the fenced in backyard to run around in, the dogs have a big case of cabin fever so we thought a good romp might do the trick.

We loaded up in the golf cart (yes, our dogs ride in the golf cart…) and we headed over to the park.Â This park is in a huge field that is fenced in and divided in the middle – one side for the little dogs and one for the big dogs.Â When we got there, I took Lucy over to the little dog side and Chris grabbed Big Molly to walk her over to the big dog side.

But they barely made it out of the golf cart before Big Molly decided that she needed to go to the bathroom RIGHT NOW.Â Right there on the sidewalk.Â Humiliated, Chris started grumbling under his breath and Lucy and I scooted into the little dog side before anyone knew we were with them.Â Chris cleaned up the mess and then took Molly into the fenced in area.

Molly proceeded to spend the next 20 minutes pooping all over the dog park.Â All over it.Â Chris couldn’t get one cleaned up before she was squatting somewhere else.Â And, I don’t know how familiar you are with dog parks, but it’s pretty poor form to have your dog crap all over the place.Â You’re supposed to walk your dog before you come in to keep the area clean, but accidents happen.Â So, once or twice isn’t that big of a deal.Â But Molly probably went to the bathroom 7 or 8 times.

And the whole time, everyone was looking and staring and pointing and whispering at Chris.Â What a terrible pet owner!Â But it wasn’t Chris’ fault.Â It was all Big Molly.Â It was like she had been saving up for the entire week we’ve been here and now that we were out in front of everyone, she was ready to let it all go.

I was dying laughing.

Dying.

Couldn’t stand up straight.

Couldn’t catch my breath.

Chris spent the entire time we were there acting as a human pooper scooper.Â And I know we probably should have taken Molly out of there, but she really needed to run.Â She’s been cooped up in a house for a week with no fenced in backyard.Â Girlfriend needed to run!

And apparently use the bathroom, too.

The whole time this was happening, Lucy was sitting next to the fence calmly, staring at Big Molly in complete disgust.Â It was the look that said, “You are an animal and I can’t believe you are my sister.”

And then Molly would crap again.

I think that Chris ended up running around more than Molly did as he followed her around with plastic bags.

The moral of this story is that even if you have a fenced in backyard, you should still teach your dog to go to the bathroom on a leash because you never know when your house will be broken into and you’ll have to relocate temporarily to your parent’s house where there are no fenced in backyards and walking on a leash is the only option.Â And in that situation, you will desperately want your dog to be able to go to the bathroom on a leash.

If you doubt this in any way, talk to my husband.Â The Human Pooper Scooper.

42 comments | posted in Around the House, Lucy, Marriage Confessions, Molly, Out and About, Suburbia, The Dog Pound | tags: dogs, humor, life, pets