Things to Do in the Hospital

03Jun

Categories: Marriage Confessions, parenting, The Bean

Because I had a c-section, I am still in the hospital.  Looks like I’ll probably be able to leave tomorrow or Friday.  In case you’re counting, that’s 4 or 5 full days in the hospital.  With a newborn baby.  And an overly tired husband.  Ahh…life’s little challenges.

So, what kinds of shinanigans are there to get into in the hospital?

Personally, I like to bother the nurses.  Especially the cranky ones.  I have this little cord I can pull that brings them all running into my room at the same time.  This has provided me with hours of entertainment.  I pull the cord to ask about television channels, to ask about when lunch is being served, to ask if I can have more lemonade.  I know its not very nice.  But its really fun to watch all these nurses come running.  Bad, Katie!  Bad!

Another fun thing to do in hospitals is to check out the other babies in the nursery.  The Bean was a pretty big dude at almost 9 pounds, but there was a 10 pound baby in the nursery the other day and WHOA was that a sight to behold.  My uterus hurt just looking at him.  I call him Bubba.  A 10 pound baby just needs to be called Bubba.  Either Bubba or Mommy Hater.

I also like to play with the buttons on my bed.  I can make this bed dance, I tell you.  For a woman who has been forced to sleep on her side with a pillow between her legs and a heating pad tied to her back for the past nine months, this create-your-own bed positioning is like heaven!

Let’s see…how else have I been spending my time?…. I know there was something I’ve been doing to keep me busy….  Now what was that?….  Hmm….

Oh yeah.  I remember.

Beaner

19  comments   |   posted in Marriage Confessions, parenting, The Bean   |   tags: childbirth, humor, life, parenting

Oops.

02Jun

Categories: Marriage Confessions, The Bean

Chris left the hospital for a few hours tonight.  He needed to go home and shower, change clothes, feed the dogs, all that good stuff.  While he was gone, I had big plans.  I was going to get up and shower.  I was going to read my baby book.  I was going to email pictures out to family.

Sadly, none of that was done.  And I blame the Beaner.

Time-stealing Beaner

I mean, how can a person be expected to do anything with these cheeks just laying around?

Chunk-a-licious Cheeks

Chunk-a-licious Cheeks

And who can even think about sending emails when there is all this hair to ruffle?

Shake your tail feathers, Bean

Shake your tail feathers, Bean

I tried.  I really did.  I tried to focus.  I tried to accomplish something.  But then I found these tiny fingers and all hope was lost.

Beaner Fingers

Beaner Fingers

And you know what they say about tiny fingers…  Where there are tiny fingers there are tiny toes…

Tiny toes

Tiny toes

By the time Chris got back to the hospital, I was babbling about swaddling methods to the Bean and his Bear.

Bean and his Bear - Professional Swaddlers

Bean and his Bear - Professional Swaddlers

Fortunately for me, Chris is helpless under the super natural powers of the Bean, too.

Helpless Dad

Helpless Dad

I think we’re in trouble…

(Click any picture for full albums on Flickr)

37  comments   |   posted in Marriage Confessions, The Bean   |   tags: babies, humor, life, parenting

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