Archive for the ‘Husbands’ Category

As you all know, we here at MC are picking up and heading south. Its crazy how all of this happened and I’m still not sure how it seemed to all work out. It wasn’t easy getting this far, and its not over yet so we will keep you posted of course. But making this decision was really hard for me in particular. It took me a LONG time to get comfortable with the idea of going back to Florida, mainly because I love it here and I love our life here.

I don’t know if you know this about me, but I’m an independent person, I always have been. I talk to my family once a week or so, sometimes more and sometimes less, but we are all ok with that schedule. Its been like that ever since I went to college. So it didn’t bother me when we made the decision to move to Connecticut to live. Sometimes I hate that I can’t see my sister for lunch and things like that but I have learned to live with it. I know that they will always be there for me if I need them. Maybe that is a little selfish on my part, but I love that me and Kate have our own lives up here. And it makes it so much more fun when family does come to visit because we could show them places that they had never seen before!

I won’t lie. I have fallen in love with New England. As a kid I was always jealous that we didn’t have snow. It flurried like twice when we were growing up and I can remember being so excited I couldn’t even sleep. CT is a beautiful place to live. There is so much history and culture and not to mention the scenic drives are endless. I love love love love love seeing the seasons pass. I’m of the out-doorsy type and I used to think the Utah was the most beautiful place I had ever seen but I think CT takes the cake. Each season has a completely different mood and feeling and I’m going to miss that so much. In Orlando, everyday looks the same. Sunny, usually warm, it will shower around 3pm, and the trees never loose their leaves. Poor trees.

But possibly the biggest hesitation I have for packing up and moving out are all of my brothers in NYC. I can’t tell you what it means to have people around that you have known for 15+ years. Justin, my best friend since the sixth grade, grew up down the street from me when we were kids. We have been friends for so long that I can remember having sleep-over’s and talking about kissing a girl for the first time. And I can remember the first time we tried a beer. And building tree-forts. Hell I new him YEARS before I met Kate (side note, I think they actually had a thing before we got together. weird.) Now I see him playing with my son and it blows my mind.

My other boys, that justin and I met in high school, all live in the city as well and let me tell you having that support group a train ride away has been awesome. I love all of those guys and I’m going to miss them more than anything.

Now I had a feeling that we wouldn’t be around all of these wonderful things forever. I figured when we had kids that we would end up in the Carolina area which both of us had the desire to live at some point. I certainly never thought we would go all the way back to Florida, and I really didn’t think we would be heading there like tomorrow.

But the reason I can to terms with all of this is this little guy.

You see, on the flip side of all of this, I have this Bean that need to think about now. I keep going back to the fact that I don’t know where I would be if my grandparents didn’t live next door to me growing up. I was my granddad’s little shadow as soon as i could walk and I know that I want BeanMan to have a relationship like that with his grandparents. We can’t do that from Connecticut, it just doesn’t work. But I guess that’s what you do when you have kids. You still make your life decisions, you just make those decisions with someone else in mind.

I love our life here. The past five or years has been some of the best years of my life. Our marriage is stronger than ever and we have a little family of our own now, so I feel like this chapter is complete. We are at a fork and we have chosen the path to Florida. The important thing is that we made the decision together. Kate started the conversation, and we talked, and we argued, and we talked, and we made the decision that we felt was the best one for everyone evolved; Me, Kate, Bean, the Dogs, and our families. My friends will always be my brothers, and Connecticut will always have its scenic drives, but Bean Man will only grow up once. And I really want him to grow up with his family close by.

Why do women have such a hard time with presents for their significant other.  Kate has been nagging me for weeks about not ever being able to buy gifts for me, she says its too hard to pick out “boy things”.  Except for clothes.  She will buy me clothes all day long, which I don’t mind, but not during a time of giving!  So, for my triumphant return to blogging I give you the 2009 Man Cave Wish List.  This one is for the ladies, but more in the hope for all of those men out their to get something better than a pair of boxers.

For the driving man.

I drive a lot.  I mean A LOT.   I’m in the car for 2-3 hours everyday (well… on days without traffic).  Most days its NPR in the morning and iPod on the way home.  To me the worst thing about the iPod in the car is how you hook it up.  Most of the options out there won’t let you have a clean, clear, and crisp sound.  Those radio station hookups are horrible unless you live in the boonies, and the tape deck ones are the next best thing…  but neither is acceptable for me.  So this year I got something new: FM MODULATOR It’s $30 from Amazon.com.  And if your driving man is even just a little handy, he should be able to handle it.  This takes the ipod and connects it directly to your car stereo!  Its perfect.

For the Music Man

For the music man in your life I suggest this book that has changed my little ears forever.  Thats right FOR-E-VER.  1000 recordings to hear before you die ($7.98 on Amazon).  This book will begin a lifelong journey.  Its a book by Tom Moon, a music commentator and writer.  He lists his top 1,000 recordings to hear before you die – and its AWESOME.  I like it because I flip to a random page and find a piece of music that I may have heard a hundred times before, but Tom Moon tells you the backstory on each piece and gives you a totally different view on the music.  For someone who is really into music of all kinds – like me – its a great gift.

For the man of the house

I found this company a while back called Simple Shoes.  And since I’m a simple guy, I took a look around their website.  All of their shoes are made from tires.  Which means your dogs can’t destroy them.  Proof is that we have found Big Molly chewing on these numerous times and they are still good as new.  Last year Kate’s grandmother bought me a pair of the slippers.  I wear them every day.  They have rubber soles so I can wear them out to the Man Cave, but they’re really warm around the house, too.  They are a little pricey at $60.00 a pair, but you’ll never have to buy another pair again so they’re totally worth it.

For the working man

I’ll admit that buying tools for men is very tricky.  Every guy has his preference.  But there are a few things that you can’t go wrong with when buying tools.  In general, a good brand of tool like DeWalt, Craftsman, or Milwaukee are going to be a little pricier but they are going to last a lot longer.  If you wanted to go a little cheaper, I’d go with Ryobi or Rigid.  In my experience – and I have a lot of experience with tools – your Black and Decker brand tools aren’t going to last very long if you’re using them often.  I’d spend the extra money and get a better quality that you know you’ll only have to buy once.

The type of tool will depend on what your guy is into or working on at the time.  But I think any guy would appreciate one of the basic power tools like a cordless drill.  If I could have any drill without price being an option, I’d choose the Milwaukee 18 volt cordless drill ($199.00 on Amazon).  The one that I have had for years is the Ryobi 18 volt cordless drill.  This one on Amazon is the new version of my drill and its pretty nice – especially for the price of $40.00.

For the gaming man

The best game out right now is Modern Warfare Call of Duty 2 ($59.99 on Amazon).  Any adult male gamer will love this game.  If your guy prefers sports, my favorites are FIFA Soccer 2010 ($49.99 on Amazon) or NHL 2010 ($56.99 on Amazon).   If you want to save money on sports games, go for the 2009 version of the game.  It just came out this year and is usually no different than the 2010 and you can find these for at least half the price. Another great gift idea for a gaming guy if he plays games A LOT is a GameFly subscription.  It works like Netflicks, but its with video games.  I think you can start out with plans around $8.00 a month.

For the unique man

Sometimes its fun to get tickets to events for Christmas.  Think about any bands coming to your area that your husband likes (the Pixies are on tour right now…hint, hint, Katie…) and see if tickets are affordable.  Or maybe there’s a sports team he follows that you could find tickets to.  If the pro leagues are too expensive, lots of towns have minor league sporting teams with cheap tickets and those games are actually a lot of fun.

For the Man Cave Man

For the Man Cave dweller in your life, he needs a ping pong table for Christmas (I’m looking at you, Kate…).

Well, that’s about all the ideas I have, ladies.  If you have questions about a specific gift, I’m happy to help or make specific suggestions.  Just leave a comment for me and I’ll respond with a guy’s opinion.  Also, if you have ideas that I haven’t listed, be sure to leave them in the comment section so others can get even more ideas.  Or, you can always email me at chris.marriageconfessions@gmail.com if you don’t want to leave a comment.

Happy shopping!  Its good to be back in my Man Cave…

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UPDATE! – I have been thinking about this gift since last night and i can’t figure out why I didn’t include it in this post.

For the Technology Man

There is a huge movement right now in the home media player.  I’m an apple guy so naturally I bought the Apple TV when it first came out.   If you don’t know, the Apple TV hooks to your TV and can store and stream movies, music, pictures, etc. from your computer.  It is an awesome little box.  At our house we have all of our DVD’s and TVshows on there so at any time we can sit on the couch and scroll through our entire movie collection, pick a movie, and it plays.  The only thing you have to get up for is popcorn.  The Apple TV is a little pricey at $229.  But there are other media players out there for cheaper.  This one from Western Digital looks fantastic at $99.  Or the Roku HD Player will stream from Netflicks and Amazon OnDemand, for $99  its a sweet deal.

This would be a fantastic gift!  And remember this is really a gift for BOTH of you because you will both be enjoying it.  Good Luck!! and Happy Shopping!

Lately the routine in our house has been great.  Kate and I both get home before 6, depending on traffic, and the major priority is, of course, the Beanster.  He gets dinner and a bath and I usually cook dinner while Kate is putting him to bed. However, the other night Kate decides that she wants to switch roles and let me take care of Beanie while she cooks dinner.  No big deal, I say, I would love to let you cook dinner while I relax with Bean.

Now I’m not sure how your house works, but anytime I make the mess cooking dinner, I take full responsibility in cleaning up the kitchen.  So I would think that this theory would go both ways.  You make the mess, you clean it up, right?  WRONG.

I don’t know if Kate has ever told you this but, she HATES to do dishes.  Personally, I think that the kitchen should be clean before we go to bed every night.  This includes the dishes, taking the trash out, wiping down the counters, etc.  Kate refuses to do this.   Every night its the same thing, “Just leave them, do them tomorrow”.

On top of this Kate has a remarkable ability to create a kitchen FULL of dishes, even if she’s just cooking a frozen one pot dinner.  I really don’t understand it.  She can cook slice-and-bake cookies and somehow the kitchen looks like something exploded in there.  And I know why.  I can hear her talking in there, “Now add a 1/4″ tbsp of sugar, 2 tsp salt, and you want to stir this up until….”  Yes, when Kate is in the kitchen and she doesn’t think anyone is around, she pretends like she is a host on the Food Network.  I used to just hide around the corner and laugh at her in there, but now guess its ok because at least she has the Bean to talk to in there.  This is how it gets SO dirty, when she’s hosting her imaginary cooking shows, she uses every tool in the kitchen.  And she is just making SLICE-AND-BAKE cookies.   So then guess who gets to clean up the slice-and-bake fiasco…  yours truly.

But its not just cooking, Kate hates to clean period.  Don’t get me wrong she likes the idea of cleaning… as in she likes everything to be clean.  But the physical act of cleaning… nope… nada… no way… not going to happen.  Take this past weekend for example.  Katie jumped up Sunday morning and randomly decided she needed to clean her bathroom.  I knew from the get-go that I would be dragged into this project somehow, so I just sat back and waited for it to happen.  Twenty minutes later I was very surprised that I had not been bothered.  “Wow,” I said to myself.  “She is actually doing it!  This is awesome!”

Then I hear her from the top of the steps…  Poooookkkkeeeeyyyy?  I need some help.  Please…

What do you need help with sweetie?

Well, I mopped but there is all this gross stuff on the floor now?

Sweetheart…  did you sweep before you started mopping?

… … well … No?….

When I got upstairs I found this:

When I walked into the bathroom after picking Kate up, I found clumps of wet dust all over bathroom floor (no need to show you those pics), so I showed her how to clean it up with a rag.  And because she looked pathetic just sitting there…

… I decided to do the second round of mopping for her.  I tried explaining how to do it while I mopped, but she didn’t seem interested.

When I finished re-cleaning the REST of the bathroom, I turned around and saw Kate throw several dirty rags into the trash can.  Apparently she has been using rags once and then throwing them out because they are dirty.  And I don’t mean using them in one room.  I mean she uses them once, on one object, and then throws them away.  Like paper towels.

Sometimes I get really tired of cooking dinner every night.  And I hate cleaning just as much as she does.  But just about the time I start to get really mad at her for leaving the kitchen or the bathroom a mess, she leaves me a little something in the fridge for no reason at all.

Damn!  How can I be mad at her after she goes and does something like that?  She knows my weakness… and probably takes advantage of me sometimes because of it…

Oh well.. i guess its totally worth it.  She DOES make my life easier (most of the time)… and I’m not sure what I would do without her…  and we DO make good lookin babies..  yeah she’s worth it…

and she brings me treats……