If I Won the Lottery…
This week, a gas station just up the street from my neighborhood sold a winning lottery ticket. I think the lucky bastard person won one million dollars. I keep looking around my town for who it could possibly have been. I was almost convinced I had found the winner when I was in the grocery store and I saw this one woman putting about 10 lobsters in her buggy from the fish monger. But then she used a coupon to buy them, so I’m not so sure it was her. Coupons just don’t scream, “I WON THE LOTTERY” to me.
The idea that one million dollars is out there, just waiting to be won has inspired a lot of daydreaming for me this week. I’ve been playing the “If I Won the Lottery Game” in my head a lot more often than I usually do. Which is a lot. I think its healthy to have a plan. I’m like a Boy Scout. Always prepared.
I haven’t always liked that game though. Once when I was about five or six years old, my parents were playing that game in the car one day while we were driving. They said if they won the lottery they would quit their jobs, sell the house, and move to the mountains. They turned around to my sister and I in the backseat to ask what we would buy and there Ginny and I sat. Crying. We didn’t want to move. We liked our house. We had friends in our neighborhood. Why did we have to leave? Couldn’t we just buy new bikes and maybe an extra swing set for the backyard?
These days, I have a very different view of what I’d like to do if I won the lottery.
First, I would pay off our student loans. Excluding our mortgage (which everyone knows is fake money anyways, right?) that’s about the only debt we have and I just hate writing those enormous, ugly, heavy checks every month. That would probably leave me with about $40 left of my winnings, so we’d probably just go to The Cracker Barrel to celebrate after that.
Alright, that version is no fun. So, lets pretend I won TWO million dollars. That gives me $999,960 for my student loans and $40 for Cracker Barrel, and an extra million to play with.
With my second million, Chris and I would quit our jobs, sell our house (which we would make NO money on right now, thankyouverymuch banking industry of America), and we’d move to the mountains. Maybe Tennessee? Maybe North Carolina? I don’t think we would need a very big house. Just something cozy with a fireplace and a view looking out over the mountains. You know, something small and quaint. Some place with a porch and two rocking chairs where Chris and I can grow old together. With two big fat matching Porsche parked in the driveway.
Chris would probably start his own company doing something like custom home remodeling and I would become a professional quilter. True, I don’t even own a sewing machine because my mother refuses to buy me one. She insists that it would be a waste of money because I don’t have the patience to sew. But with my lottery winnings, my first purchase (aside from a new house in the mountains and dinner at Cracker Barrel) would be a sewing machine. I have visions of spending my days in a beautiful, bright room over looking a mountain or river or some other nature crap, surrounded by quilts and…whatever stuff you make quilts out of.
Okay. Maybe quilting isn’t the right occupation for me. But this is MY LOTTERY FANTASY, so lets just pretend I’m a quilter in the mountains.
After paying off my student loans, having dinner at Cracker Barrel, moving to Tennessee and becoming a professional quilter, I would then start planning ahead. I’d definitely put some ridiculous sum aside for Beanie. Hopefully he’ll use it to put himself through college and then to launch his career on tour with the PGA. But if that doesn’t work out, he can always use it to bail himself out of jail for either lots of small things or one giant thing. Its really his call.
I’d also give a good portion to charity. I’m a charity junkie. I think its the guilt that we are born with in the South. We’re always feeling guilty for something – being healthy when someone else is sick, being happy when someone else is unhappy, being wealthy when someone else is poor. There are lots of ways Southerners purge themselves of their natural sense of guilt. Some go to church. Some drink beer. Some go to church and drink beer. Personally? I give to charity. My two favorites that I give regularly to are St. Jude’s Children’s Hospital and the Special Olympics. So, they’d get two big ol’ checks from me.
Next, I’d fly my entire family to some exotic location for a vacation. Why? Cause I wanna.
The next few purchases would be in no particular order:
– A turtle
– A Mini Cooper
– A pair of diamond stud earrings
– A house in Nice, France
– A snuggie
After all of that, I figure we’ll probably have about $50 left over from my lottery winnings. So we’d probably go back to Cracker Barrel. And I’d get dessert this time.
Cause nothing says “I WON THE LOTTERY!” like Cracker Barrel’s pecan pie a la mode.
27 Comments
Dave
Come on to the Carolinas, we’d love to have you….. Just don’t mention your from Florida, especially in the Mountains. They never took too kindly to people from Florida coming in and buying up all the land. Oh, and develop a liking for sweet tea.
Lori
My husband and I were talking about this just the other day. If we won the lottery we’d: give to our church/ various missionaries, pay for the rest of his schooling (he’s in pharmacy school, which is not cheap), pay off our house, and have a baby.
It’s fun to dream. Love your blog!
Jeannine
Just a quick note to say thanks for the daily laughs! Check out my blog for some award nominations 😉
Deb
I’d pay off our student loans and mortgage too. But with the other million, I would probably buy my own island. Then every year all the fans of Kate’s blog could come for a 1 week long vacation and we could party! hehe
Summer
You are seriously hilarious! Thanks for making me nearly pee my pants every single day!
Tressa
I’m with ya on that beautiful home on the lake! That is a gorgeous view!!! I won’t ever win the lottery, because I don’t buy them. BUT…if I ever do I’m going to buy you an IPod of your very own, in whatever color you want!!!
(Plese don’t hold your breath, like I said I don’t buy them ;-))
Nona
Wow this is a good one! I have 3 daughters so for me we would pay off our bills but share equal with our girls! This means we get out of debt together!!
If its a big one ie.. 2 to 25 million then we all want to go to Italy for a month and then France for a month!! Nothing like traveling for a good time. Oh the possibillities!!
Kristen
I found this website that’s giving away FREE snuggies! I signed up for one even though I think they look kinda ridiculous, haha!
http://www.suzzly.com/snuggiepromo.html
deepa
Haha! Nice post! I do this a lot to, but everytime I mention winning the lottery, my ever-practical husband points out that about 60% would go to taxes. Spoilsport.
Sarah H.
I want to move to North Carolina or Tennessee as well €¦but not when I win the lottery–but in like 5 or 6 years. We’ll see, I’ve learned enough that life does not go how you meticulously planned it. We plan, God laughs. But if I did win the lottery I €™d give some to charity and I €™d travel to Australia, Italy, and Hawaii—not all at once. I €™d spread it around. I don €™t have any debt to pay off (oh wait my car €”but that €™s not a lot, like $12K) but I don €™t own a home either—so I €™d pay in cash for a nice house in NC or Tenn 🙂 And if there was more I would buy a half dozen of those minature ponies and take them to the hospital to visit all the sick people and make the smile 🙂 It would be good.
Laura
LOL Too funny. I’m not even sure what I would do with it. Pay off our debt, buy a new car, and save some for Cam. Oh, and take a fabulous vacation to Tahiti or something! 🙂
Mindee@ourfrontdoor
Yeah, a million dollars just isn’t as much as it used to be is it? You’d definitely need that 2nd million or so to actually quit your job.
Whenever Rich and I play “If I Won The Lottery” we can NEVER mention a new house because our kids get all upset too. 🙂
Elizabeth S
It’s fun/depressing to play the lottery game…I have a snuggie (my Valentine’s Day gift) and think it’s highly overrated. No one has arms that long! And I have a Mini Cooper. It rocks and I recommend it!
Mallory
Haha,I’m sitting here reading this in my zebra print Snuggie. It’s awesome. And it’s still long enough like a normal blanket to cover my feet. 🙂
Haley
Katie, you had me at Cracker Barrel. My husband and I have seriously considered me taking a second job at that heavenly place so at least we’ll get an employee discount for all three meals that we would potentially eat there.
I don’t play the “If I win the Lottery game.” I play the “If I married a millionaire” game, I find it’s more fun when the million dollars is constantly being replenished.
Kelly H.
I was actually thinking about this the other day, while I was working. I don’t think I would quit my job. My husband thinks I’m crazy, but I don’t think I would. I would most definitely, pay off my enormous student loan, set aside money for my future children, buy a new home, take a vacation, and give the rest to charity (ASPCA and Special Olypmics). IF I won more than a million dollars and could afford it, I would buy a VW bug convertible from the 60’s or 70’s and a house at the beach.
Kelly H.
Oh and the snuggie, I got one for Valentine’s day…It’s definitely over rated. I mean, once you put it on you can’t really do to much. I think the Sham Wow or Slap Chop might be a better choice.
Jennifer
I love the mountains!! That sounds like a good plan. And…I say you try to win at least 2 million…you will need some extra cash for all of those meals at cracker barrel!
Camberley
One time I was visiting my friend and she pulled out the snuggie. After I got through my initial shock, and laughter, I gave it a whirl. IT WAS AMAZING! Now I’m a firm believer.
~C
Kelly H.
I would pay off the mortgage too and then buy a house on the lake in Cooperstown. Then I would go back to school for PT.
Snuggies are now offered in pink for breast cancer awareness month!
Mel
i love that you would become a quilter in the mountains! that sounds pretty great to me. i started quilting this summer and i’m hooked. hey if you ever want a custom made quilt for the bean just let me know!
Rosemary
A turtle????
Katie
I’ve always wanted one.
Kristen
I have to put in a shameless plug for Dave Ramsey:
Imagine if a 30-year-old couple made $48,000 a year and saved 15% in a 401(k) at 12% growth (not including an employer match). ($7,200.00 a year/$600.00 a month)
At 70 years old, they will have…
$7,058,863.50 in the 401(k)!!!!
Cas
My cousins won the lottery about 5 years ago. At the time they were living in a trailer home in Delaware debating whether to pay the electric or the water bill that month. They won the lottery though, shared it with their siblings, and bought everything their hearts desired…
They ended up unhappy though with a lot of problems. Funny how that happens (not “funny haha” per say…)
Maureen
Mmmmm… cracker barrel. I never get to go there because Matt thinks it’s lame. Boo.
Katie
Chris does, too. But he’s helpless against their biscuits and gravy. Get him every time.