Long Days
I’m beat.
Like, all the time.
You know when you wake up about half an hour before your alarm goes off and then you’ve just fallen back to sleep when it actually does go off? That’s the kind of tired I am. Part of it is working. I’ve worked in offices before and I’ve stayed home before and both of those environments had their own unique challenges and perks. But teaching is exhausting in a completely different way.
I talk all. day. long.
And I walk all. day. long.
Between teaching and then pacing around the room, I’m talking and walking just about the entire day. While it isn’t mentally taxing (though I do find it incredibly stimulating), it is physically exhausting. By the end of the day, I’ve literally run out of words to say. Chris doesn’t know what to do with me. Once the kids go down, I’m like a mute. I just sit there. Staring. And occasionally demanding wine in a sippy cup.
But I have experienced unemployment and so I know better than to complain about working now. I love my job. My days are fun, full, and fulfilling. I’m not complaining. I’m just stating the obvious. My job wears me out!
Then the afternoon bell rings and I get to start my second, most important job. My mom job. That one’s a doozey, too. Bean’s at this great, inquisitive age that has him asking 1,000 questions a day. He wants to know what we’re doing, why we’re doing it, and what everyone else we know is doing while we are doing what we are doing. He’s very concerned about tasks right now. I’m not a psychologist, but I think he must be realizing that not everyone does the exact same things that we do. For example, when we go to church, Bean always runs down the list of his favorite people, asking if they are going to their church, too. Pretty smart cookie, that kid. But it is really tiring to answer all those questions.
And Gracie needs just as much attention as Bean. She’s at that age where she’s really attached to me and doesn’t want me to go too far. Some of that is her age and some of that is because she’s in daycare all day so when she finally sees me, she wants to keep her eye on me so I don’t disappear again. Because of that, I’ve been doing a lot of things lately with Graciekins on my hip. You should see my biceps. Those suckers are firming up.
Sort of.
Kind of.
Okay, not really.
But I have to tell you, for as tired as I am, for as exhausted as my body is, for as fried as my brain has become, somehow there’s always enough energy to go around. Just when I think that I simply can’t do one more thing, Bean asks me to jump like a frog.
So, I do.
When my days seem to get longer and longer, something about my kids makes that exhaustion just melt away.
And that’s not saying anything about what kind of mom I am. That’s saying something about how powerful and important my kids are in my life.
I’m not a real sentimental person. For as much as I share on this blog, I’m actually pretty tough when it comes to emotions and mushy stuff. But, honestly, I just never knew I could feel like this about someone. The way I love my kids is truly amazing. It’s how I know there’s a God, because there’s no way I could have this much love inside me on my own.
There’s no way I could have this much energy by myself, either. It must be divine energy. Or, toddler energy that has just seeped into my pores by osmosis from Bean.
But I’m guessing it’s the God one.
I love my babies because of who they are. But I love them just as much because of who they inspire me to be. Especially on those long, tired days.
22 Comments
Aunt Ginny
I think you’re a pretty fantastic mom. Yep, you’re awesome. Proud to call you my sis-tah!
Cindy
Cute post– love that you have a pearl bracelet and hoop earrings on while playing with the Bean:)
Jen @ Caved In
It’s exhausting putting on your work hat then your mom hat and finally your wife hat AND having enough energy to devote to all 3. There’s really no perfect way to do it but to just do the best you can. You’re happy in your job, you’re babies are loved, and you’re marriage is still going strong. Job well done, Katie.
Waiting for Bulgaria
As a mom, a wife, and a teacher all I can say to that post is “Amen Sister!”.
Kendall
You are an AWESOME Mom. I don’t know how you do it all. I’m a SAHM and a graduate student, so I know how hard it is…but reading your blog about the meals you make, the hours you put in at work, and the enthusiasm you bring to your family truly inspires me. Keep it up, Mama!!! God has blessed you for sure.
Sandy
i see that bean man has the same indian name that my son has…one sock =o)
Jenna@CallHerHappy
I used to teach as well. Fortunately, we are blessed enough that I can stay home. I can’t imagine having the strength to work and take care of a family! Phew. It tires me out thinking of it. But, you do an awesome job of it. Your kids inspire you. You inspire us!
Mindee@ourfrontdoor
And you’re still in your 20s. Doesn’t it make you wonder how people in their 40s who have kids that age manage it?
Ashley @ A Recipe for Sanity
You are an amazing mom! Bean and Gracie are blessed! And can I just tell you, on a side note, that you look awesome? Must be all those bicep curls from the kiddos. 😉
Alaina
Aw, you’re such a great mommy! Your kids are just too cute! Love the frog jumping pics!
Katy @ MonsterProof
How I know I’m exhausted? My Chris has actually woken up with the baby the last 2 nights and I DIDN’T HEAR IT. Love this post and the goofy moments with Bean.
Laura @ Casa del Hansen
How sweet!! You are an awesome Mom, and Bean and Gracie certainly know it and love you just as deeply for it (you’ve caught it on camera – it’s on their faces everytime they looks at you!!).
Kimberly @ The Sparks Life
I hope I am as good of a mom as you are one day! And I agree with Ashley…you do look great!
laurenbtrain
You are a rockstar and should be proud of yourself and how you love and take care of your family! You are selfless and its obvious you would give all you had for your kiddos and Chris! By the way, you look super skinny in the pics! Must be all that jumping like a frog that Bean man has you doing!! Keep up the good work! Maybe you can get some R & R this weekend!
Amanda H
I love reading your writing. I understand about the work exhaustion thing and then having to go home and be a parent. I work as a social worker so I deal with high emotion and stress all day. You may be exhausted but you look great and HAPPY!!
Amber@Classy Confessions
OMG Katie I feel you. Kinda. I am only student teaching, but honestly by the end of the day I am exhasuted. I know people who have worked another job while student teaching plus had a kid at home and I do not know how they do it. I am only student teaching and I am exhausted. When I get home I feel the same way. I don’t even want to talk. I have to make myself communicate with my boyfriend sometimes because all I want to do is go to sleep.
Sonya
Ah, the school worker exhaustion. I know it well and I don’t even have any kids yet!
Kat @ Living Like the Kings
It’s truly amazing what kids invoke in you. I have many days when I am frustrated, tired, and just friggin’ done with the day by the time I am on my way home. But the second that I see my little chicken nugget and her toothless smile, the stress, the pain, the tiredness just all melts away.
Rebecca @ The Reluctant Housewife
Um…you’re looking awesome! I thought that in every single one of your pictures…quite impressive. I think I’ve said this before, but I’m continuously grateful that I have your blog to read everyday, it helps me know what’s ahead…and also how to handle it with grace. Thanks =)
Maggie
I am so impressed with your ability to “get up and go” when you get home. I feel like I come home from teaching every day dead on my feet. Every beginning of the school year, I am reminded how often we as teachers talk. It’s virtually non-stop all. day. long! It may be a difference in elementary and middle school, but I know that in a few months my kids will start doing more work and more talking and I will be doing less (more of a facilitating role). What a relief that will be! So, to cut this novel short: Keep up the great work! And send some energy up to SC if you find any to spare…
Tressa
Katie, your such a good Mommy! And a hot mommy at that!!! You look GREAT 🙂
Julie S.
This is a very powerful post! Being a mom is a TOUGH job, and you work on top of it! You are my hero. It’s amazing the love and power children have in our lives 🙂