Around the House,  Husbands,  Just for Fun,  Marriage Confessions

Crisis in the Middle of the Night

-33
Saturday night, in the middle of the night, I was woken up out of a dead sleep by what I thought was a gunshot. I sat up in bed, listened very intently, and within two minutes, I heard two more shots back to back.

Now, we live in a very safe neighborhood in a very safe part of town. I mean, it’s the suburbs, for crying out loud. Our neighbors drive Volvos and recycle their newspapers. They have Tupperware parties and exchange Christmas coookies.

But I was positive of what I heard. So, I kicked Chris and whispered violently, “Wake up! Go see what that was!” To which he replied sleepily, “You’re being ridiculous.” And then he rolled over and went back to sleep.

BACK TO SLEEP, I TELL YOU!

Clearly, I was the only one who wanted to defend and protect our household (which consisted that night of Chris and I and two dogs because the kids were at my parents). So, I crept down the stairs in the dark to peek out the front door. I was convinced that if I turned on a light, the person or people who had the gun would come to my house. This is how my brain works at 3:00am.

After seeing nothing, I crept back upstairs and went to the window to peek out. As I did, THREE police cars drove by. They didn’t have lights on or anything, but they were booking it down our street, one after the other.

Now, I went back to Chris.

“CHRIS!” I whispered loudly. “Wake up! There’s police in our neighborhood now!”

“No,” he said, from under the covers somewhere. “There’s not.”

Let’s pause in this situation so that I can tell you just how much I HATE IT when Chris just blatantly denies something that I am ABSOLUTELY certain about. It makes me want to flick his ears. How are you going to sit there and tell me I didn’t see what I just saw when YOU ARE SLEEPING UNDER THE COVERS WHILE OUR HOME IS UNDER ATTACK! Gaaahhhh! I’m getting mad all over again just thinking about it. Now I want to flick his ears again!

“YES,” I shouted in a whisper. “THEY JUST DROVE BY!”

“Katie, go to bed,” he snapped. At this point, Chris was getting really pissed off. And I was terrified. I was 100% certain that I knew exactly what had had happened, somewhere in my neighborhood. In my head, someone had shot someone and was now running around our neighborhood, looking for somewhere to hide. And I just KNEW they were going to try to hide in our house. And when they broke in, I would defend our home with honor while my lazy husband slept through the whole thing.

I spent the next hour sitting next to the window, listening for sounds. A few times, I could have sworn I heard voices and intense shouting, but I couldn’t be sure. When I turned around to Chris and whispered, “I THINK SOMEONE’S YELLING!” he responded, “Just close the window, Katie.”

Close the window? As if closing my window is going to make the PEOPLE WITH GUNS just disappear????

I saw the police drive back by one more time and so in my head, I continued the imaginary scenario I had created and I now envisioned that the police had apprehended ONE of the people, but that there might be another creeping around. And so, I stayed up all night long, running to the window to peek out at the slightest noise or car that might pass by.

And through it all, Chris slept soundly.

I woke up this morning, groggy and foggy headed after only an hour of sleep since 3:00am. I searched our neighborhood for any signs of anything strange that might have happened in the night, but couldn’t find anything. Nothing. Nada. Zip. Not a car out of place or a shrub that had been disturbed. For about three seconds, I thought, “Maybe I did imagine it all?” But when Chris snapped at me this morning, “I’m exhausted because you kept me up all night with imaginary crime scenes…” I adamantly insisted, “I know what I saw and heard and shame on you for not making the effort to PROTECT AND COMFORT YOUR WIFE, YOU JERK!”

Inside though, I’m still not quite sure what I really saw and heard that night… Just don’t tell my husband.

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20 Comments

  • Marina

    I think this kind of thing has happened to all of us at least once. It’s always funny what our brains can imagine at 3 in the morning 🙂

  • Amanda

    Did you know there is a police scanner phone app? I have one called 5-0 for my Phone you can instantly hear all police, fire, and ems communication when you launch the app in your phone. We live next to a fire rescue center and so I turn it on when their siren goes off to find out what the call is. Accident, house fire , domestic disturbance etc. some say this is being nebby but like you I am compelled to PROTECT MY HOME!

  • Babytromm

    This sounds JUST like my housband and me. I am always the one left defending our home and children against bad men and their guns. One day just know they will actually show up while my husband sleeps through the whole thing!!

  • Jen M

    Too funny. That’s pretty exhausting! Not too long ago our house alarm went off about 2 AM. My hubby jumped out of bed to protect his home and family armed with his cell phone as a weapon (and flashlight). Turns out our daughter didn’t shut the back door properly and the wind blew the door open but it was unnerving at the time. I suggested next time he grab his gun or baseball bat- both more intimidating than a cell phone.

  • Brina

    This sounds JUST like Tommy and me! Only, I (gently) kick him so he wakes up. After he investigates the front of the house, I always feel better and am able to go back to sleep. Did you ever find out what happened?

  • HeatherM

    I can definitely relate. A few months ago, I heard gunshots, three loud pops, and they sounded CLOSE- like in our backyard vicinity close. I turned off all the lights in the house and ran upstairs and opened the window and called 911. When the cops showed up, they tried to tell me that it couldn’t have been gunshots because we live in a very safe neighborhood. Fortunately, they still canvassed the neighborhood for the next hour, and they ran into some neighbors who heard them too (which really made me feel not-crazy, because my hubby looked at me like I’d gone bonkers when he walked in the house an hour later)

  • Nate's Mom @ Nate is Great

    Chad and I got married on Kauai by the most wonderful officiant, Kelvin Ho. More than half of the ceremony was in Hawaiian. When something like this comes up, we have a running joke that Kelvin made the other promise to do whatever the other is asking — in Hawaiian. If you don’t remember it, it was the part of the ceremony where you nodded and said, “Uh-huh” because he was chanting — in Hawaiian. I think you need to renew your vows when you go to Costa Rica — in Spanish. Then you’ve got yourself covered for life. 🙂

  • Kat

    Katie, you are hilarious. But just for the record, I would advise that you do not get up and look out windows if you hear gun shots. instead, I’d urge you to either climb under the covers or hide in a closet. You just never know!

  • Lindsay

    I live in kinda a weird area in Orlando where sketchy things can happen–there is a Denny’s right by us where everyone seems to go to after the bars close downtown, and I always see cop cars there and then hear about something going on later in the news. So I signed up for this website called Spot Crime where they email you all the police incidents within a 5 mile radius of the address you put it. It might make some people paranoid, but I like knowing if something happens in our complex and surrounding area, and it’s not like people publicize that stuff! You don’t have to sign up for the emails, I think you can just put in your address and it will tell you what’s going on too.

  • Stephanie @ Our Marriage Adventure

    HAHAHAH. This happens in my household all the time because of how heavy a sleeper Alex is. Luckily now I’m on meds that cause me to sleep-annoy him and I can honestly say that if I did what you did I would have NO memory of the situation. So tell us, did you ever find out what happened??

  • S

    Again, you might as well be talking about my house! I did the same thing last night…heard the noises, convinced myself someone was breaking in when I “heard” footsteps. As I kicked my hubs to wake up with the famous chant “did you hear that? go check that out. did you shut the garage door?”, I got the same response as you did. How annoying is it that guys can sleep right through these things, without a shred of care, and we jump at the slightest drop of a pin. grrrrrr

  • Jen S

    Ha! I always do this!! I hear the littlest noise and swear it is someone opening our front door. And once the scenarios start playing out in my head, there is no going back to sleep!

    Except the one time my husband thought he heard a gunshot, and I swore it was just a transformer blowing…turns out it really was a gunshot. Oops.

  • Aoife

    The other night I smelled smoke and I went outside and there looked like a tree burning. My husband was next to me and I had to call the fire department because a few teens were burning garbage in their backyard and the fire was huge and dangerous.

  • Jay

    “gunshots???? let’s look out the window!!!!! and the door!!!!! Screw taking cover, I wanna see!!!” typical suburban reaction…. shameful.

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