Phase One: Bean Meet Potty
Last week when our daycare teachers confirmed our own suspicions that Bean might be interested in potty training, Chris and I decided it was time to begin. But it’s overwhelming to think of all the different ways of teaching kids how to use the potty! Finally, after thinking through a few tried and true methods we’ve heard about, Chris and I decided to do it our own way. Or rather, Bean’s own way. We’re customizing our potty training method by taking a few bits from all the things we’ve heard about and coming up with a way that fits with Bean’s personality and preferences.
The first step in our process is to get him to understand what the potty is for. Even though Bean has shown signs that he’s ready by understanding what’s going on in his body, he has to now understand how the potty connects to those bodily functions. To do this, we made the potty the most fun place in our house! It’s the place to be!
Since Bean has no issues with real potties, we decided to use a potty seat on the real toilet instead of a little potty.
I went with the one from Target that was around $10.00. It was padded and had handles, which I liked. I was a little bummed that they didn’t have any of the seats with cartoons or something on it, but it turns out that Bean didn’t really care one way or another.
Once the seat was in place, we moved Bean’s stool over to the potty so that he could get up and down on his own. He still can’t get up on the seat by himself because he has to sit so far back and he can’t scoot himself too good on it, but he can get down on his own. Plus, I think the stool makes him feel more comfortable by giving him some place to put his feet so he’s not just hanging out in space.
Once our necessities were in place, we added some novelties. First was the jar of M&M’s. Bean gets one M&M for going pee pee in the potty and two for…the other thing.
Originally, that’s really all I had in the bathroom for him. But when I’d put him on the potty, he’d get bored after just a few seconds and ask to get down. So, I had to come up with something to keep him on the toilet for longer. I decided to put the books we’ve bought him on potty training on the back of the toilet with the M&M’s. These things sit in a little basket along with washcloths and other bath accessories. It looks cute, but more importantly it holds everything we need for potty training in one place.
With our potty area all set, it was time to start the introductions.
Bean meet Potty.
Potty meet Bean.
We first started putting Bean on the potty at every diaper change. We thought that might help him associate diaper functions with the potty. Then we added other times throughout the day – when he woke up, before he went down for a nap, when he got up from a nap, and before bedtime. When he gets on the potty, he actually likes it. He sits there and we read potty books and we talk about the potty and about…bodily functions…and we sing songs and we talk. At first, he only would sit there for about 2 or 3 minutes before he asked to get down. And we always take him down when he asks. We don’t want to force the process on him. But gradually, he started staying on for longer periods of time. In about two days, he was staying on for 5 or 6 minutes at a time. And then today when I would ask him if he was ready to get down, he would shake his head and say, “No,” and then ask to read his book again. I was thrilled!
The goal of these little sitting spells isn’t to get him to go potty. There are two reasons we’re doing this: First, we want him to get comfortable on the potty (which he clearly is) and, secondly, we want to do the best we can to catch him peeing on the potty. If we can work it so he happens to be sitting on the potty when he goes, then we can celebrate and hoot and holler and, hopefully, Bean will start to understand what the purpose of the potty is. If we can’t get him to pee pee when he’s on there, then he won’t understand what he’s supposed to do there.
So, this all has gone on since Friday afternoon. And then today I was home with Bean because of President’s Day and when I put him on the potty before his nap, HE PEED!! He actually did it! So, I started cheering and dancing and high five-ing like some lunatic and Bean just kind of stared at me like, “What’s all the fuss about, Mom?” He really didn’t understand what was going on – until I gave him the M&M. And then he still may not have understood, but he liked whatever all the fuss was about. After he got off the potty and I called and/or texted everyone I knew, we went on about our day.
Then tonight at dinner, Bean yelled out of nowhere, “Poopies!” So, Chris and I took him to the potty to see if by chance we could catch it again. AND WE DID! There were no poopies, but he peed again. This time it was nice to have someone else in the bathroom with me while I cheered and danced because Bean still didn’t seem to care. Except this time, he instantly said, “MMmmm…” (M&M). At least he’s understanding the rewards part of this whole deal.
As excited as we are that Bean was using the potty, we’re keeping a little perspective. When he uses it right now, you can tell he doesn’t really mean to do it. It’s just been two cases of good timing so far. But that’s how he learns, so we’re one step closer. Bean is still, of course, in a diaper. We probably won’t move him over to big boy underwear for another couple weeks at least. He has to know what he’s doing and he needs to be able to do it (mostly) on purpose, not on accident. When he’s understanding the concept a little more, then we’ll feel comfortable putting him in real underwear. If we were to do it right now, it’d be a mess and it would also be really frustrating and discouraging for Bean. He’s just not ready yet. But he’s getting there!
Potty training, I’m already learning, is about little victories. Which is a lot like parenting in general, really. And today we had two little victories of great timing! We’ll keep trying to get the timing right until Bean seems to understand a little more about what’s happening. At that point, we’ll move to Phase Two: Big Boy Underwear!!! Look out, World!
23 Comments
Amy@ThingsINever
hey, I like this. I’ve been a bit stuck for potty training ideas, more overwhelmed with all the advice and not being able to find a good place to start. I’m going to copy your lead! 🙂
Alaina
Go Bean!!! You know, I’d use the bathroom more often, too, if I got some M&Ms 🙂
alison
great ideas! good job Bean!
Mellen
If you haven’t looked for one of these yet, you should! My local BRU doesn’t carry them and I haven’t gotten around to ordering it online.
http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=4020541
Tressa
Way to go Mom, Dad and Beanie!!!! He’ll get it down. M & M’s are the key to getting everything accomplished! 😉
Elizabeth@The Sweet Life
How fun–I’ve heard great things about M&Ms as well!
Jennifer
Potty training is one of the few things that terrifies me about having children lol. Good luck Katie and of course, good job Bean!!
TMae
I, like you, feel pretty on top of most parenting things. But potty training? I get all anxious and hivey trying to understand how it will work. And then yesterday, just for kicks, I put kidlet on the toilet just before his bath, while it was filling (since he tends to get in the bath and pee) and darn if HE DIDN’T MAKE PEE PEE!!! It was a coincidence, I’m sure, but it sure was a neat one!
I’ll be eagerly following your progress with Bean.
Jen c
It may have just been timing but that’s still pretty darn impressive for only starting Friday. I’ve heard bribery with chocolate will help, as it does with anything. Congrats!
Lindsay (Young Married Mom)
How exciting! This is a ways off for us yet, but you’ve made it much less scary already. And I love this: “This time it was nice to have someone else in the bathroom with me while I cheered and danced because Bean still didn’t seem to care.” I can totally see this happening to me, too. . . .
Mindee@ourfrontdoor
What an encouraging start!
molly
Yay Bean! Potty training wasn’t half as bad as I thought it was going to be. Actually, the trick that worked for our son was switching him to big boy undies. When he went pee in his diaper he couldn’t feel when he was wet because it wicked away all of the moisture. When he can feel he is wet that’s when he learned to go to the potty! We also have a couple of potty training books he read that I think helped him understand what a big deal it was too!
laurenbtrain
GO BEAN!
Sarah S
How exciting! Potty training is tricky but it sounds like you’re off to a good start. We bought one of these toilet seats which I found the kids liked better than the one that just went on and off. It felt more secure to them I think. Good luck!
http://www.bedbathandbeyond.com/product.asp?SKU=16897795
anna D.
Have you seen the pull-up commercials? You can go to the pull-up website and download “the potty dance” songs! Sounded kinda fun and though you might want o check them out for the Bean man! Good luck with potty training! It looks like you have a well thoughout plan for this new adventure!
Cindy In Owensboro, KY
Just remember that each child is different. My little one seemed interested for awhile and then lost interest. Then she showed interest again and so I tried the Pull ups but that didn’t work. So I finally just took the big PLUNGE and put her in underwear and she is finally potty training for real. She is 28 months and has a few accidents here or there but is doing rather well.
Sonya
Sounds like you have a great plan! Just a tip (after working for a couple of years with 2-year-olds) don’t buy pull-ups! I helped trained several kids without ever using them. We just taught them how to remove their diaper when they needed to go and we helped them put it back on. Plus diapers are much cheaper!
Hilary
I was going to buy Pull-ups, but my daycare provider said the same thing as Sonya (see above post). My daughter started the potty-training process at two and she almost three and still isn’t fully trained. At first, I was concerned, but my pediatrician and daycare provider said not to pressure her. So although my momma-anxiety is working overtime on this potty issue, I’m remaining calm and staying the course. I’m really hoping she’ll be out of diapers in a month or two (she’s almost there)! Anyway, I just wanted to say, don’t get discouraged and keep making the experience a good one for Bean!
Mom of 3
Very impressive start! Because of his age don’t be surprised if Bean’s enthusiasm for the potty comes and goes. My advice would be to keep it low key for a while. It could take a couple of months (not weeks) to get to the underwear stage. Rushing that process is a big (and discouraging) mistake. At one point my recently “trained” son starting having accidents and I read this helpful info: Sometimes a child may be able to stay dry consistently during the training process, but as soon as the focus is no longer potty, potty, potty, they start having accidents. The explanation was that young kids can often stay dry when they focus all/most of their attention on the subject, but no one can maintain that focus indefinitely. Until their body is even more ready, accidents will be plentiful. At that point I took a step back (my son was 22 months), went back to diapers, and continued to cheer for his potty successes, but he didn’t have to worry about accidents. Within another 3 months he had matured enough to go to underwear full time. I hope Bean turns out to be a potty training prodigy, but if not, you’ve already laid the groundwork. You sound like you’re doing all the right things so far…continued good luck!
Bee
Admitedly I don’t have children although I was one at some point and with Bean’s quick realisation of the reward method, i’d suggest you be on the look out for sneakiness and cheating. Unfortunately those M&Ms may encourage his acting skills to try and fool mummy. Good luck!
Megan @ Red Dirt and Crazy
GO BEANIE!!!
That is really awesome! And it sounds to me like he knew something was about to happen when he told you ahead of time…that is GREAT!
We’re potty training right now as well and this week things are REALLY improving. She actually quit playing with her toys this evening and said she needed to go do a…#2…and she DID! Needless to say…daddy and I were SO excited! And she was really proud of herself!
🙂
Megan
P.S. You might try pull-ups first. Q-Tip loves Toy Story more than the princesses so we bought her the Toy Story Pull-Ups and she calls them her…Lordy…Woody Panties. lol… BUT…she doesn’t want to get her Woody Panties wet or dirty and treats them just as she does her big girl panties. She sleeps in her pull-ups and when we leave the house she wears them but when we are home she is in real panties. I really feel like completely getting rid of the diapers really helped her to see the change in the situation. If that makes any sense. But of course…I wouldn’t suggest that until Bean and YOU are ready. The thought of her having accidents all over the place freaked me out. But in our case turned out she could hold it A LOT better than we thought she could and my thoughts of her being a constant stream of pee wasn’t the case! lol… There have been accidents of course but luckily we scotchguarded the carpet when we moved it so I usually have enough time to soak it up what little is on it before it settles.
GOOD LUCK!!
P.P.S I feel weird that I just talked about pee and…#2 in your comments section. Ahhh the joys of motherhood!
Nova Kristin
What a great start!! When you’re ready to teach him to aim, you might think about using cheerios. My son loved throwing two or three in and then aiming for them. It worked really well and we didn’t have pee everywhere LOL
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