Glide Me

I slept my way through New York yesterday.   And not in the fun way.

I was in New York takin’ care of some business before I headed out to see the family in Atlanta.   I was a little nervous about spending the entire day there because lately my feet have started swelling (attractive, right?) and the only thing I could think of was, “Where will I sit down all day?”   I had to be at this office by 9:00 AM and then had to stay in the city until 8:00 that night because Chris and I had tickets to see In the Heights on Broadway.   That left me with 11 hours to kill.

The entire day ended up being a search for a place to sleep.

I was fine until about 11:00 AM, and then my feet started to get achy and my back started to hurt and my eyes started to get heavy.   It looked like the beginning of the end.   But think about it.   When you’re in a city all day, where can you sleep – or even put your feet up?   I started to sympathize with the bums.   I also started to scope out park benches, but decided in the end I could probably be a little more clever.

So, I found a Barnes and Noble.   I figured I’d curl up with a good book in one of their strategically placed comfy chairs and rest my tooties until I was ready to eat (which is about every 45 minutes lately…).   But when I got to Barnes and Noble, the only chairs they had were those old wooden ones.   The kind in the courtrooms on TV.   Not ideal, but it would work.

I fell asleep within 10 minutes.   Dead asleep.   Like when I woke up, I had dropped my book and purse on the ground and was sitting there with my head thrown back, no doubt snoring.   Again, all of this makes me a very attractive person.   That glow they say preggo ladies have?   Yeah, its probably just saliva smeared on their face from drooling in their sleep.   That can glow in the right lighting.

I decided to move on.

I grabbed lunch on a park bench and contemplated the liklihood that my belongings would still be next to me when I woke up if I happened to doze off there.   Not a good chance.   And so I moved on again.   And guess what was around the next corner?   BABIES R US!   And do you know what Babies R Us sells?   Gliders and rocking chairs!!!   SCORE!

So, I head into B.R.U. in search of a napping chair.   And man, did I hit the jackpot!   In this B.R.U., they actually set up mock nurseries to display their cribs, bedding, and rockers.   And these little set ups all have short little walls around them.   Its really like you are in your own nursery. It was my own napping room!   I looked around for a little bit and finally settled on a lovely cherry wood zoo-themed nursery that had a gloriously comfortable rocker AND ottoman.   This display was in the back corner, so I figured I’d get less traffic.   I put my backs down and jumped in the rocker and was sleeping in less than 5 minutes.

I slept there for 45 minutes.   Anytime I’d hear someone coming, I’d just pick up the pricetag thingy and pretend to be reading the specs of the chair.   And when they left, I’d go right back to sleep.   It was pretty awesome.   And brilliant, I think.   I was tempted to run out and tell the bum sleeping on the park bench across the way about my new find.   But then I had this mental picture of word getting around and there being a bum-rush on B.R.U.   Every nursey filled with a bum.   Just chilling in their glider.   I think it’d be great, but B.R.U. may have an issue…

After 45 minutes, I figured I had probably worn out my welcome or at least been noticed on the security cameras, so I headed out into the streets again in search for my next napping grounds.   This time, I ventured into Filene’s Basement because I remembered they had couches in their bathroom area.   SCORE!

At this point in my day, I was pretty shameless.   And my feet were getting bigger.   So, I put my bags down, kicked my feet up on the coffee table and snoozed for a while.   Another 45 minutes later, I moved on.

I eventually landed in a second Barnes and Noble, where I spent the rest of my afternoon sitting in the coffee shop with a good book and my feet propped up on chairs.   This is how Chris found me.   And then he hung his head in shame and took me out for dinner.

If pregnancy has taught me anything, it is that sometimes you just need to rest.   And if that happens to be in a city that never sleeps, well, you’re gonna have to get creative.