Bake Like You Mean It

So, we all know that I’m not a baker.   This has been proved time and again.   Most recently with cake pops (read about Part I here and Part II here).   But I’m nothing if I’m not persistent, and so I continue to make the effort to become a better baker.

Next step:   Boxed cake mixes.

Beanie’s daycare has a Halloween party on Friday and – if he feels better – we’re gonna go.   He gets to wear his costume and I get to bring treats for the kids.   Yay!   Kids will eat anything!   Yay!   So, since I am home with Bean today for the one millionth time this month, I decided to make the most of my time at home by baking mini chocolate cupcakes for the Halloween party.

I won’t bore you with the mindlessness of baking mini cupcakes from a boxed cake mix, but let me just tell you that these cupcakes were perfect.   Perfect.   Moist and fluffy and yet firm and filling.   Just perfect.   All these puppies needed now were some icing and sprinkles.

Except here’s when things started to go downhill.   See, I poured these chocolate sprinkles into a bowl and dipped the iced cupcakes in them to give ’em a good, thick sprinkled coating.

(As a side note, I have never dipped into sprinkles before.   I’m more of a sprinkler when it comes to sprinkles.   I sprinkle them over the top of the cupcakes until some eventually stick.   This was my first time dipping.   And I loved it!   I felt like I was breaking some crazy sprinkle rule.   God, I love a good sugar rush of rebellion!)

So, I’m dipping all of my cupcakes into the sprinkle bowl when suddenly, tragedy strikes.

I run out of sprinkles.

And I still have one cupcake left. So, there sits that one lonely, naked cupcake.   He just looked so pathetic.

So, I did the humane thing.   I put him out of his misery.   It was really for the best.   He went on to a better place.

Well, you know how eating mini anythings goes.   Once you pop, you just can’t stop.

My next victim was this guy.

He wasn’t standing up straight.   He was sort of slumped over to the left a little.   He was a lazy soldier.   And you know what happens to lazy soldiers.

They get eaten.

Its for the greater good.   Trust me.

Well, then I was on a rampage.   I became fearless.   I started knocking off mini cupcakes like a crazy person.   Some of them had legitimate ailments.

Like this guy.   With the chocolate sticking off the side like that.   I can’t be presenting these to no preschooler with chocolate hanging off the side like that, can I?

And then there was this one.   I mean, he’s just asking for it.   Its the icing that did this one in.   Threw him right under the bus.

Before I knew it, I had sacrificed more than half of the cupcakes.   My wax paper was a barren wasteland of missing cake.   Huge holes stuck out where entire families of mini cupcakes had disappeared.

Oh, what had I done?   What had I done?   I had murdered the cupcakes that were for the children.   For the children. What kind of person had I become?

Like any guilt-ridden addict, I drown my sorrows in the hard stuff…

…and then I packed up the surviving cupcakes.

Only, they wouldn’t all fit into the carrier.   I had originally planned to pack two carriers of cupcakes, but with this one full, there weren’t really enough of the remaining cupcakes to pack a second carrier.   I mean, there were only a couple left.

So, I hunted around for some small container to carry these remaining cupcakes in.   But when I turned around, they were gone!   No where to be found!   I have no idea where they could have gone…

Personally, I think it was a Halloween miracle.