Family,  Health,  Marriage Confessions

Can You Hear Me Now?

Beanie has been in daycare almost two months now.   In those short eight weeks he has already had one cold.

I have had two colds and two ear infections.

Carrier.   Monkey.

Right now I am battling two ear infections.   Its awful.   My ears hurt all the time.   I went to the doctor last week and she gave me some antibiotics, but they are still sore.   Not as bad as they were, but not back to normal yet either.

A couple days ago, I was telling my sister about them while we chatted on the phone.   I was driving from work to pick up Bean from daycare and talking to Ginny on my cell phone.

I know, I know.   I shouldn’t talk on my cell while driving.   I have had several different police officers already make this point very clear to me.   But its the only time when I have a solid block of time to talk.   That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

So, Ginny and I are talking so much that the ear I am holding my Blackberry up to starts to get really hot.   So I switch ears.

And suddenly, everything goes silent.

“Ginny?” I said.   “Ginny?   Are you there?”

No answer.

“Gin!”

Nothing.

For a split second I remember my ear infections.   Could I have lost the hearing in one of my ears?   Surely not.   But just in case, I switch the Blackberry back to my other ear.

GASP!   I could hear Ginny talking again.

“OH MY GOD!” I yelled.   “I’M DEAF IN ONE EAR!”

As I’m wailing and moaning and almost in tears and trying not to wreck my car, Ginny is saying something and trying to calm me down.   But I’m inconsolable.

“I’ve lost my hearing!   That stupid daycare!   Stupid carrier monkey kids!   I knew I should never have trusted that place!   I should have quit my job and we should have lived out of our car!   At least then I’d still have my hearing!   Oh, the agony!”

“Kate,” Ginny said.   “I hit the mute button.”

“Huh?”

“I accidentally hit the mute button,” she said.   “You aren’t deaf.”

“You mean I can hear?”

“Yes, moron.   I just happened to hit the mute button when you switched ears.   It wasn’t your hearing.   You’re fine.”

Oh.   Well then.   Okay.

I heave a sigh of relief and silently say I’m sorry for calling those toddlers stupid carrier monkeys.

Nothing like a little drama on your afternoon commute to keep life entertaining, eh?

21 Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *