The Name Game

Everyone wants to know if this bambino in the belly is a boy or a girl.   We won’t know until around Christmas.   What a bummer.   But I have my thoughts on the subject, with or without an ultrasound.

I have never had very good intuition and I’m not very “in tune” with my body, so I seriously doubted that I would be one of those people who just knew the sex of the baby.   But I think I might.   Since I have been pregnant, whenever I picture the baby or talk about the baby or look at baby things, I have been seeing a boy.   Its not that I wouldn’t love a baby girl, but when I uncontiously think about it, I see blue.   With red hair.   And freckles.   Actually, I am half worried my kid is going to look like this:

(That’s Opie from Andy Griffith for all you poor TV Land deprived souls…)

And besides my own intuition in this case, my sister called me with hard core proof of the gender.   My phone rang and I answered and heard, “What month was your baby conceived in?”   She’s never been one to beat around the bush…   She put this information (August, by the way) along with mine and Chris’ birthdates into a website which then spit out a gender.   A boy.   So you see?   Besides my own intuition, the INTERNET believes I’m going to have a boy.   What more proof do you need???

So last night after I got off the phone with my sister, Chris and I started talking about boy names.   Now, we’ve been pretty private about the whole naming thing.   We don’t want anyone’s opinions to influence us, so we’ve kept the conversations between the two of us.   At first, Chris didn’t want to pick names at all.   When we got our dogs, Chris didn’t want to name them until he saw their personalities.   I calmly explained to Chris that the kid probably won’t have a personality until he’s about 3, so what are we going to call him until then?

Chris reconsidered and spent the next half hour shooting down all of my names.   But when I pushed him to give some options, I knew I had made a mistake.   I feel like you should know what Chris wants to name our child.   I feel like the world should be aware of the type of person I am married to.

1.   Colt McCoy – You know, as in the Texas quarterback.

2.   Petey – Not Pete.   Not Peter.   Just Petey.

3.   Willy – Not Will.   Not William.   Just Willy.

4.   Charlie – Keep in mind that our last name is Brown.

5.   Pooh Bear

6.   Marty McFly – From Back to the Future.

I cannot stay married to this man.   He hates our child already.   Why else would he choose these names?   Personally, I think this stems from the fact that Chris can’t add anything else to his Man Cave until our child is in college.   As retrobution, Chris will call the kid Willy.