This past weekend between the changing of the grandparent shifts, Chris and I were sitting with the dogs and the Bean on our back deck enjoying a brief break from the rain. I realized that I didn’t have a burp cloth with me (an enormous mistake that a first-time mom only makes once) and so I decided to go into the house to get one. I was carrying Beanie and when I walked through our back glass door, I almost killed him.
The glass door swung open and I walked half way through before it came slamming shut, catching the Bean’s head in the process. It smacked him right upside the head.
It took him about 3 seconds to realize that this sensation was pain and then he opened up his lungs and let the sunshine in. He wailed and wailed.
And I did, too.
“Oh, my God! I’ve dented his head!” I cried. “I’ve given him brain damage! He’ll never be the same!”
I walked inside and tried to calm him down, but he was crying pretty good. And the harder he cried, the harder I cried.
And as if things couldn’t get worse, in walks Chris.
Chris started following me around the house as I tried to calm the baby. And the whole time he was repeating things like, “Wow! He’s really crying good!” or “I’ve never seen him cry like this!” or “He must be really hurt!” And with every statement out of Chris’ insensitive mouth, I cried a little harder.
If I hadn’t been watching for signs of a concussion in the Bean, I would have killed Chris.
I finally got the Bean all settled down and sleeping. I pulled myself together. I attacked Chris. And then I took my own nap to recuperate.
When the Bean finally woke up a few hours later, I was relieved to see him smiling and cooing like he normally does. He didn’t seem to be mentally incapacitated. Maybe I hadn’t done significant damage after all.
And then, just as I’m standing there reassuring myself that everything is okay, Beanie sneezed. Snot came shooting out of his nose.
“OH MY GOD!” I yelled. “IT’S BRAIN FLUID! HE’S LEAKING BRAIN FLUID!”
Chris came running and thankfully was more sympathetic this time, insisting that it wasn’t in fact brain fluid, no matter what I’d see on Grey’s Anatomy.
Its been several days and there doesn’t seem to be any more brain fluid (or snot) leaking from the Bean’s brain so I’ve sort of let the incident go. I’m sure I’ll probably wack this baby in the head a few more times in his life, so maybe all things considered it wasn’t so dramatic afterall.
But I’m still watching for brain fluid. Just in case.