Have Anotha’
Today while Chris and I were at work, we chatted on Google Chat. We usually chat during the day. Nothing too big or time consuming. Just little things like, “Did you feed the dog this morning?” or “I just ate an entire box of cookies” or “Expense reports are the devil.” You know. Little things.
But today, just to spice things up, I decided to throw in a little somethin’ extra to see what Chris would say. We were in the middle of talking about lunch or something trivial like that and I thought I’d slip in a little controversial topic just for fun.
(Before reading this conversation, you should know that Mike is Chris’ office mate. He sits across from Chris.)
True. G-chat during work is probably not the best place to approach the topic of more children. And probably posting it on this blog isn’t either. But Chris leaves me no choice.
Every time I try to bring up more kids, Chris brings up more dogs.
As if that’s a fair argument.
As if getting a puppy will bring me the same satisfaction as having another baby.
Sadly, it kind of works. I stop for a split second and think of puppy feet and puppy breath and puppy velvety soft fur and for a split second I am deterred. But then my uterus kicks me in the ovaries and I am brought to my senses. The problem is that I can’t actually verbalize a good argument against getting another DOG that isn’t actually a good argument against having another BABY.
We don’t have the money.
We don’t have the time.
We don’t have the space.
They pee everywhere.
All true of dogs. Also, all true of babies.
This weekend when I was inappropriately talking about having another baby while we were at the food court in the mall, I told Chris I thought we needed another baby to balance out the order. 2 parents. 2 dogs. 2 babies. Perfect. He actually had a hard time coming up with a valid argument against that one.
It seems weird to say it because Bean Man IS still a baby, but I miss having a teeny, tiny baby. Its so exciting and new and fresh. And while I wouldn’t wish Bean back to that stage, it would be fun to get to know another baby from the very beginning again.
And, (if you were around during my pregnancy, you’ll understand why this next statement is an act of God) I sort of miss being pregnant. I miss the tummy, the heartburn, the lack of sleep, the eating whatever you want, the elastic band pants. I miss it. But mostly, I miss having a little Bean in there to hang out with me all the time. In the middle of the night. Driving in the car. I just kind of miss that.
Also, I want a girl. A little pink girl with bows and ballet slippers and princesses and fairies and tea parties. I’m an excellent tea party thrower. My plan is to just keep on havin’ babies till I get a girl.
Chris’ plan is to never get naked again.
Party pooper.
In all seriousness, I know we’re not ready for another one quite yet. I know that we’re not ready financially or practically. But I’m just lettin’ you know that the very nano-second that we are ready, I’m gonna pop out about fifteen more babies.
That is, if I can get Chris to take off his chastity belt.
Pansie.
64 Comments
Lori @I Can Grow people
I want another too! And I definitely miss feeling the kicks and nudges in my belly. But we are waiting for a couple of reasons: 1) We want to give Porter the attention he needs right now. 2) Aaron is up for tenure next year and we need to figure out if we are staying here or going elsewhere before we add another little one to the bunch. But I do get all weepy when I walk passed girl baby clothes at Target and I also get all weepy when I think about Porter possibly having a little brother.
Allyson
2 really is a very very nice number. i’m sure 3 or 4 or 15 is too, but i’m sticking with 2 🙂
Jessica @ How Sweet It Is
Hahaha so sounds like me and my husband – but I’m just trying to convince him about baby #1!!!
Sarah H.
I love this 🙂 I hope you get your girl!! I know lots of people who have kids 18mo apart….so in about a month you’ll be good. Haha. I’m sure the grandparents LOVE this post! I on the other hand have a husband that wants 4 or more kiddos! I like 3. But I say, let’s take it one at a time 🙂
Julie
Dude, I totally get it. It’s terrifying to think of having another, yet I can’t get rid of the thought of having another…life is an adventure, lol. We’ll chat with you about it 😉 My DH would pass the frick out if I mentioned it. Btw, I did NOT look that cute pregnant…awesome pic!
Rachel
Your blog always make me smile. My husband and I read it together and are always mentioning how similar you and Chris are to us. If I could convince my husband to just have 1 baby for now I’d be happy. 🙂
Jen
It’s funny how so many of us want another baby when our current one is still a baby. My husband’s the same way. The mere mention of the *possibility* of wanting another child makes him huddle in the corner and cry like a little girl.
I am on the fence about wanting another one right now since Ellie is too much of a handful for me to handle already. The thought of another one makes me unsure if my sanity will stay intact after I give birth a second time. That said, I secretly do hope that we will have another one someday. I really want to have a boy to “balance things out.” I just need to convince the husband that another baby will be a good thing.
Meghan
Our boys are 3 years and 1 month apart, which has been a great age difference for our family. The oldest (Emmett) has been helpful from the start (getting burp rags, pacifiers, giving toys to the baby, etc.) and was potty trained just a few months after #2 (Colin) was born (I was hoping for before Colin’s birth, but alas that was not the case). And it is SO cool to watch them interact……Emmett loves Colin dearly and gets so excited about him, and Colin just lights up when his big brother enters the room. I half expect “Emmett” to trump “Ma Ma” in Colin’s order of saying new words.
I know it’s only going to get better as Colin gets older (he’s 8 1/2 months now). Having 2 is definitely harder than just having 1 in all aspects of life, but I also know that things get easier as they get older and can do more for themselves…so I know that part of why it’s so exhausting now is that Colin is so young. I have several friends that have decided to only have one child, and I feel kind of bad for their kids, knowing how dear my own sibling is to me and seeing the joy and love developing between my two boys. I do have several friends that have kids that are 16-20 months apart, and it was pretty challenging for them in the beginning with basically two babies. Everyone is different, but there’s no way I could have done an age difference less than about 2 1/2 years….having Emmett be able to do so many things on his own (even being able to entertain himself while I took care of a newborn) made such a difference for me!
Margaret
Haha this post made me giggle. Our boys are only days apart, but wow, I am so not ready for pregnancy. Pregnancy is really the real reason I can’t think about another right now. I keep telling people that when the scales tip on that one we can have another. And they’re starting to head toward even, but not close enough to give it another try. =) Also, the idea of another child is so strange to me right now. How could I love another baby the way I do my little man? Don’t get me wrong, we want a lot of kids, but right now I’m trying to remember that this is the only time I’ll have just one, and I want to cherish it. But who knows, maybe in a couple months I’ll be ready again. You know, when Jupiter is in the seventh house, as your BFF the PW says. 😉
tessabella76
Haha! Guys are so funny about babies! When we got engaged, my (now) husband said he wanted to start trying for one right after our wedding. The closer it got to our wedding, the more he started wanting to push the time back. As it is, we’re going to start actively trying in about 6 months. He really wants a baby but I think the reality of it scares the s*&t out of him! I’m ready now and I think I can wear him down a bit!
Melissa
Isn’t it funny how against all rationale the ovaries kick up and nothing can sway you from wanting a little baby? Even if you can acknowledge the impracticalities, it doesn’t matter. Here I was thinking I’d be satisfied, at least for a while, after I got #1 and now you’re telling me this may happen as soon as 8 months after!? There is no hope, ovaries are traitorous. 😀
Sarah
The title of this post reminded me for some reason of the song from Guys and Dolls called “Marry the Man Today”
“Marry the man today and train him subsequently
Carefully expose him to domestic life
And if he ever tries to stray from you
Have a pot roast
Have a headache
Have a baby
have two!
Six
Nine!
STOP!”
Hehe, good stuff.
Sarah
Oh and…is that REALLY what your gchat looks like??? SO cool. Mine totally does not look that way.
Mom of one
That’s what we did… 2 parents 2 dogs 2 kids.. we are prego with our second and just found out its a boy!! so we will have a girl and boy! PERFECT! Balance in our universe.. Being prego the second time is way different cause you are still busy with the first.. but I will say I missed it.. and I will miss it when this one is done..
Melissa
You make me laugh. I think that lots of people have this chat, we are chatting about our 3rd AAHHH. I am not crazy!!!! mine are 21 months apart and our second was a suprise. Our 1st was had just almost died Litterally and was just out of the ICU two weeks when we found out we were pregnant (God’s funny joke). It has been a wonderful whirlwind of life and I would not change a thing. Thanks for sharing!!! I love your confessions!!!
Ella
I started wanting another baby when my son was about 3 or 4 months old.I LOVE being pregnant and the whole new baby stage and of course because the two i have are totally gorgeous!(i have a girl & a boy). Trying to convince my husband to have a 3rd baby – well its not going to happen anytime soon! I hope you get to have a girl – a girl version of Beanie would be adorable!
Kayla (aka The Chained Maiden)
Hey Katie
I can’t wait to get Danny out of his chastity belt to give me one of my own. I’m the youngest were I work and the only woman without a child- I really feel left out. And I was born with my biological clock ticking. I’ve had my wedding planned since before I got my period and wanted a baby since around the same time, I guess too. He makes the same arguments as Chris and really all I have to say in rebuttal is “But that’s a little you. It’s a little you and a little me in the world. It’s the physical embodiment of our love. How can you say you can’t make space for that?” It’s funny, Danny talks about getting a dog too as a replacement for my little baby. A dog can’t replace that, I don’t think. A child lasts longer too; a dog can’t take care of you when you’re old and grey, though there are wonderdogs that save people from burning houses…
Ashley
“And I was born with my biological clock ticking. I€™ve had my wedding planned since before I got my period and wanted a baby since around the same time, I guess too…”
I’ve felt that way my whole life and never knew how to describe it! You’re not alone, lol.
Kimberly Loomis
We have three…only one was on purpose…and she’s the middle child!
Jeska
Maybe to help you stop day dreaming so much, (since you’re not “quite ready”) I can help by reminding you about your sore, very swollen feet. 🙂
You do make beautiful babies though!
Abby
You make me laugh, I’m glad I found your blog! I’ve got 3 kids and have noticed that when eventually you just feel that NEED to have another baby and you know it’s time 🙂 Oh and as far as the babies/puppies debate… babies my be expensive, time consuming, take up space, and pee everywhere, but aren’t they just a gazillion times cuter when they do!
Candice
My sister had her second – a girl! – when her first, a boy, was 20 months old – so he was about 10 months when she got pregnant, not far from where you are now. But she says that being pregnant the second time around was so different because she was so busy with her son (who started walking at 10 1/2 mths, so he was into everything) that she wasn’t as focused on the pregnancy the second time around. The first time around we got emails all the time about how far along she was, all the “the baby is now the size of a banana!” stuff – but the second time around she didn’t do any of that.
I think she’d recommend it because it’s nice to have your kids so close in age, but it’s not the same experience as your first pregnancy when that’s all you’re thinking about.
Lisa
LOL, my hubby and I keep pushing back the time to actually start trying for baby #1, neither one of us feel ready just yet.
Emily
My brother is 18 months older than me. We beat the bejeezus out of each other until we were 22. But now that we are in our 30s, we are crazy about each other. I say go for it!
For me, I’ve been married almost 9 years and am hoping for a first baby one of these days when hubby gets on board. I’ve learned to enjoy being without children while it lasts and am heading with my hubby to Nepal for a month in a few weeks. But man, I want me some babies!
Tina
Yeah, I’m right there with ya, but for us it will be baby #3!
Love your blog girl, keep it up!
Kristin
HA, I love Chris’ reply!!
deepa
haha – Josh and i do the same dance:)
ever since my son hit three months and lost that “newborn” look, i want another one, and i get a little more vocal about it after some wine…. of course, money, my job, space, our sanity all are valid arguments, but i still want one:)
hey, we have all the stuff already! it’ll be cheaper the second time – right?
Meredith
lol- your posts always make me laugh.
I remember reading your posts (and Chris’) when you were preggers so I can’t BELIEVE that you are missing that stage. And I can understand why Chris is not missing it one bit.
But, I LURVE me some babies…and you’re Bean is too cute. I can just see the little girl Bean now.
Mindee@ourfrontdoor
I wanted four.
Until I had the third one.
Kristin
I’ve been following your blog since you were pregnant and am finally delurking! Had my baby girl a few weeks after you had the bean … and I totally have baby fever again! I feel you sister … nothing like a teeny tiny baby when your baby is so big already. Best word of advice I’ve received … there is never a good time to have a baby, if you wait for a good time, you’ll never have another baby! (Husband isn’t a big fan of that one!)
Leah
My husband is wearing his chastity belt too and we don’t even have one! He’s told me before that my clock is ticking loud and clear but it’s not happening yet. But it’ll be sooner rather than later.
P.S. I read him your post and he’s sitting here glaring at me for referring to him and a chastity belt in the same sentence. 🙂
Mommy, Esq.
There will be a million reasons not to have another kid “right now”. We decided to take the plunge when our twins were only 6 months old (sleeping through the night of course do you think we are crazy!). I’m a few months away from #3 and yes, I am worried about the cost, the extra coordination (you will at least have man-on-man with two), the sibling interactions. Instead I’m focused on what a fun family we will have (hopefully) – the rest should fall into place. I was on maternity leave with 3 other women and 3 of the 4 of us are due within a week (the other is stay at home). You are not alone in your craziness!
Casey
I am just starting to feel those nudges and kicks and I KNOW I am going to miss this part! And, to me, that just means more babies! To hubby, not so much.
Katie van der Meer
My husband and I just had our second son. We conceived when my first was Beans age(7 months right? or is he 8 months now? i have a terrible memory cause i know you just posted all about his new age.) My son is almost 17 months now and our second is one week old. I have to say it is fantastic but I am very tired. Going from one to two is very challenging but very worth it. I do hope to have a girl in the future… I plan to just keep trying until I get one or maybe even two.
Kate Buselli
Hi! I’m a new reader, found you on the bloggie nominee page, and i love your site! We have a lot in common..I married my high school sweetheart (kind of, we went to high school 3 hours away), and we are expecting our first baby! This post made me laugh because I am 6 months pregnant, and my hubby informed me recently that he wants “3 in 3”. As in, 3 babies in 3 year. Although exciting, this is slightly frightening to me. I’ve talked him down to 3 in 4 I think. Want him to talk to your honey?? lol
MistyK
Hi! (Another New Reader for You) Im Currently 6 months Along with our First( a girl!), and i can tell this wont be my last! I told the Husband the other night that i was a bit addicted to the whole business and am going to miss it insanley. Im going to miss feeling little kicks dearly!
But i am looking forward to meeting my little Madison and learning her. And Teaching her, and Tea Parties!
Tressa
I can’t wait to see how precious a girl Beanie would be!!! Think we could help persuade Chris?!?! 😉
Elisabeth
This post gives me hope. I’m engaged right now and I honestly can’t even picture having kids at the moment. When I do have kids though, I’d like to have at least two….everyone needs at least one sibling to fight with! Pregnancy and giving birth scare the crap out of me, so I’ve always been afraid that after the first baby I will flat out refuse to go through it again. Knowing that even after a C-Section, you’re ready to go for it makes me feel like perhaps my hormones will take care of it for me after all!
Ashley
I’m sure Chris will give in at some point. 😉 Someday, the Bean will have a little sister, and she will never be allowed to go on a date. EVER. 😉
Mrs. D
Oh my gosh this post is so funny and so sweet! I love that gchat you posted.
Good luck with the convincing! I hope you get your second little one soon.
Christina
Ha! That is too funny! Speaking of your pregnancy, I was trying to look up your pregnancy posts of the Bean in your Archives, but was unable to view any posts further back than January of 2009. Is that how your Archives are supposed to work? I started following your blog shortly after you had the Bean, so I wanted to catch up. 🙂
Regina
I’m 45. I’ve never had the slightest urge to have a baby. But I want YOU to have another baby.
DO IT! DO IT! DO IT! DO IT! 🙂
Katie
You are SO that friend in college who never drank, but made everyone around them drink!!! I remember you!
Sarah
I think you just gave Chris something to write about over in the man cave!
Betty
WHAT THE HECK? EVERYONE says they miss being pregnant! I’ve always wanted four kids, but at the rate we’re going, this kid is going to be an only child (and i was only nauseaus for 2 days, i’m just a whiner). I guess the missing it comes when I’m not in the middle of it. But, I am all for y’all having another kid. Get pregnant soon, so I can read about someone going through it at the same time as I am 😉
Jen
Your posts still crack me up almost daily- but the pregnancy hormonal posts- they were just “laugh until you almost pee” posts. My vote is yes. LOL
Laura
You should argue for Bean to have siblings. That’s harder for someone to argue against. I love my sisters and brother to death and I can’t imagine life as an only child. It’s a very sad thought.
Amanda
Me too!! Me Too!!! I even bought the Ov test kit this weekend! You have the power to make this next baby happen you know. You can get him when he’s at his weakest, and when the timing just happens to be perfect. hehehehhehe.
Alison
Our kids are 24 months apart. Baby #2 is 6 months and we are STILL adjusting. While this is our last (supposedly), I too already miss my tiny baby and being pregnant and I had a horrible time after birth. (I ended back in the hospital for 7 days with a c-diff infection). Anyway, we have one of each and buying “pink” is AWESOME!
Tracy
Take it from someone with TWO BOYS…..nothing is guaranteed. I remember thinking, when I found out my second was another boy, “Awww crud!I don’t get to buy all new stuff!” And then with a beaming smile on my face, I realized “I don’t have to buy new stuff!!!!”
Ann in SC
Well, if you wait until you can afford one, you’ll NEVER have one.
That was the BEST advice I ever got, and from my brother of all people. If you had asked me before I had kids if I could afford to put away $6000 a year for daycare expenses, I would have laughed you silly. But somehow, I manage to do just that, and have only seen my paycheck increase a wee bit since the beginning 9 years ago.
Our two are 18 months apart. Two boys. I would have loved having a girl. I get to borrow my nieces and my friend’s girls instead. Since I don’t know any differently, I think it is the perfect age spread. My only problem is that #2 is almsot as tall as #1, so hand me downs are a thing of the past….
I say go for it!
Krista
This post cracked me up – men are so funny about baby #2 – it took me 2 years to get it. Good luck! I too LOVED being pregnant, I love the 9 months that it is just you and the little one. No one else has that time with them, it’s so special. I feel honored I got to spend the time with my kids in that way. While I was pregnant with #2 I had to go to San Francisco on a business trip and I hated leaving my hubby and son, but I had baby girl to keep me company :o)
Ginny
DON’T DO IT YET!!! WAIT UNTIL I CAN CONVINCE JM TO GET ME KNOCKED UP!!! Thanks, Your sister
abi
I’m a new reader and am loving your blog…and this post in particular….so sounding like me and my husband right now! Although I’m trying to talk him into being ready for baby number one. We’re getting there….after a lot of talks like yours! Thanks.
Athol Kay: Married Man Sex Life
Well lets be honest here. Unless Chris really does have some sort of Chasity Belt (I’m told they chafe), he’s basically on the hook for however many Bean 2.0s you decide to pop out. Women always seem to find a way to “opps” the birth control if they really want a baby. 🙂
The husbands basic option is to either be happy or sad about it.
Hilary
My husband used the exact same “dog” argument! What’s up with that? Anyway, we almost just had one – our daughter was/is quite a handful! Eventually we convinced ourselves that we could handle just one more, got preggo about four months after her first birthday (hubby wanted them close together but I wouldn’t let him near me until the baby was at least a year old) and now we’re having a boy who’s due next month! It’s exciting to think we’ll experience both genders but we are SO done after this little guy comes. I had fairly easy pregnancies but I won’t miss it at all – I want to get back into regular clothes, not worry about losing weight ever again (at least not baby weight) and moving on from pregnancy and childbirth. Plus, my daughter is such a raging Daddy’s girl that I feel left out most of the time – I wanted a Mama’s boy and gosh darn it, this little man is ALL MINE! At least that’s what I’m hoping! 🙂
Laura
my mum got knocked up a second time when i was around Bean’s age- my brother and i are only 20 months apart! when we were little, i loved having a sibling who was close enough to my age that we could actually, you know, HANG OUT together. plus, he’d do everything i told him to. twerp. haha! (my poor poor older sister. she had TWO annoying baby siblings to look after…)
but there were also some downsides, too, that have repercussions for me even today. because i was so young when my mom got pregnant again, and then after my brother was born, i didn’t really get as much attention as i needed because they needed to take care of the “little” baby first. for example, i was never carried or held as a toddler because they were always holding my little brother. it taught me a lot about independence at a very young age but i think i missed a really important developmental part of my relationship with my mom and that’s why she and i don’t really “get” each other or have a good relationship.
i think that if you want to have another baby, it’s important to note that you need to have enough time and energy to take care of a teensy-weensy one while still paying attention to Beaner.
Melissa N.
In our case, I’m wearing the belt. After six years (well, it’ll be six in June) of marriage, I’m finally on the idea of having a baby. And to be honest, blogging doesn’t help – everywhere you go, someone on here is pregnant, or just had the cutest big-cheeked baby. And my uterus is now pinging at me that maybe, just maybe it’s time. Well, that and we both turn 27 in July doesn’t help it either. *lol*
Renee
My husband’s a pansie too. Only he’s a pansie about just one. We’ve been married for FIVE YEARS! But four of those years I was in college, and I just got my big girl teaching job. Now that everything is in place, he says we need to “enjoy” it first. Uh…hello? I would ENJOY having a baby!
Queen of Quirky
Katie –
You are giving me hope. Not only have you been succesful at parenthood for #1, you are thinking about #2. I still haven’t gotten to #1 yet, and am terrified, so maybe I’m a pansie too. But the bigger pansie is my fiance who is setting this two year time schedule on us. Sheesh. He thinks we should like enjoy our marriage and stuff. Whatevs… 😉
whitney
I would rather go throw labor and delivery every other month for 9 months then be pregnant again. THE WORST. I died, came back to life and then became an elephant. No thank you. But, I know I will again, someday. Just not today, or tomorrow, or next thursday. Im the pansie in the relationship. Zach wants a bazillion kids.
Kiana
omg this entire post had me cracking up and giggling to myself at work hahaha
Jody
Oh dear, I have to admit I’ve done the same damn thing and we adopted our last babe. I wanted to feel that pregnancy again just for a moment. I think I romanticized it just a tad.
It took us a mere 6 months to start trying again, and another 5 to conceive. It was fabulous having my babes 20 months apart, I’d highly recommend it. Of course we’re on our 4th so I ALWAYS recommend more kids ;). GL convincing Chris!
Ann
I am so glad I am not the only one! It has been a challenge to get my husband to even think about it. We did IVF and we have some frozen ones left – so we need it is long shot.
I love that you miss having your baby with you all the time like when he was in your tummy. I thought that was only me!
But if I don’t get a girl the second time around, he is wearing pretty pink dresses anyway!