Why I Should Not Live in Florida

Last week I came home from running errands with Bean Man and I found this on my kitchen floor.

I couldn’t tell what it was at first, so I did the natural thing.  I started screaming bloody murder.  And throwing things at it.  And jumping on furniture.

But the bugger never moved, so I got a little braver and stepped into the kitchen only to find it was a gator from the top of Bean’s animal birthday cake last week.

Clearly, I have not quite adjusted to my new environment just yet.

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23 Thoughts to “Why I Should Not Live in Florida”

  1. Hahahah I don’t really live anywhere where snakes or lizards, etc are common, but I am STILL scared of things like that, so I would have freaked out, too!

  2. Katie C

    Hilarious!!!! And so something I would do!! 🙂

  3. Alyssa

    This is so freakin hilarious! Thanks for the laugh!

  4. Re

    Ha, oh my goodness! That is hilarious. I probably would have done something very similiar!

  5. kay

    go gators!!! it does look scary though!

  6. Lisa

    Hehehe, can never be too careful….I mistaken dust bunnies for spiders all the time and freak out just like you do!

  7. Ha. That’s funny. How the heck did that thing get over there? Guess I am glad I don’t have that problem in Vermont. I just have to worry about BEARS. ugh.

    Cabin Fever in Vermont

  8. That is Halarious!!! Lizzards and snakes aren’t real common in MN, but June Bugs send me screaming and running for a locked room.

  9. I’ve done the same thing with a small dog toy, I thought it was a mouse!

  10. Lee Ann

    Too funny! Years ago, a friend’s dad despised flies; would chase them all over the house, to his mom’s consternation. (A video of him tiptoeing around the house with the flyswatter would have won America’s Funniest Video.) Anyway, we found some VERY realistic plastic flies and attached them to the dining room curtains before a Sunday dinner to which I was invited. I have no words to tell you how we struggled not to laugh when Dad spotted the fly, tiptoed to the kitchen (fly still hasn’t moved), snuck up on the fly (which still hasn’t moved, so Dad can’t believe his luck), then reared back with that flyswatter swing and almost brought down the curtains. He was so proud of himself until he picked up the suspiciously plastic-y fly … and we died laughing. I don’t think he ever forgave us that practical joke!

  11. Kat

    HAHAHAHAHAHA! You are hilarious!!!

  12. Jennifer in CA

    too funny! At least it wasn’t a real one. 🙂

  13. hahaha, so funny! Good thing Bean didn’t leave his toy outside you might have fun over it with the car.

  14. Ha, that is hilarious…you will need to look out for more of Bean’s toys…those things are known to attack, you know…

  15. Liz

    This was hilarious, i would have done the same thing!

  16. Ashley

    HAHA!! When I see a bug or something scary, I usually run to find one of my husband’s shoes (because of course I could never use mine for such a nasty task), and by the time I get back with a shoe, I can’t find the creature. The other day, a spider crawled under the couch while I was reaching for a shoe, and I haven’t seen him since. :/

  17. Laura

    I would have done the same for sure. Are there cockroaches in Florida? There are here in Australia and I think those are the absolute worst!

  18. In the first photo, it looks almost as if it’s eyes are maliciously glowing at you!

  19. Tawny

    2 years ago we were staying with my folks in their basement apt. Well in order to leave we had to walk through a storage room. Anyway my niece has a lifelike alligator toy that was 3 feet long and someone decided to place it in our path as a joke. Long story short we both started to yell our heads off and in order save himself my husband shoved me in front of him and promptly locked me out of the safety of our apt.

    We still laugh about it to this day!

  20. I admire your natural instincts. I too scream at the sight of something unknown on the floor.
    A few months ago I was laying on the living room floor when a spider crawled across my shirt. My primal instincts kicked in as I screamed, flapped my hands at it to brush it off, ripped off my shirt and leaped on the couch. My brave husband tried to find the spider but couldn’t. A few minutes later I had to go to the bathroom. As I was sitting on the toilet with my pants around my ankles, the spider dropped from my shirt into my undies.
    Of course I started screaming again. My husband busted into the bathroom and found me standing in the corner in only my socks and shirt.

  21. R$

    My kitty has a bunch of toy “mouseys” that he loves to play with- the more realistic, the better for him. One day I was getting ready for work and he was playing with one by putting it in my shoe and digging it back out. It wasn’t until I was ready to put those shoes on that I discovered “It’s a real mousey!! It’s a real mousey!!” OMG I started jumping up and down on the couch and I called my husband at work (what was he supposed to do about it). I was freaking out so loud his entire office knew what had happened.

    Discovering it was fake is way better than discovering it was real.
    (And yeah, totally late to work that day. Had to buy new shoes.)

    I miss you Katie 🙂

  22. Keshet

    Hee hee! I would have totally freaked out, too!

  23. melissa

    That make me laugh out loud. So funny. One time I had my door opened and a bird flew in my house. Sounds harmless but it freaked me out. I called my husband at work screaming. I just left the door open and it flew out a couple hours later. Still makes me shiver.

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